Last month you had a holiday overseas where you stayed with a friend. He/She has just sent you some photos of your holiday. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter ● thank him/her for the photos and for the holiday ● explain why you didn’t write earlier ● invite them to come and stay with you

#month #holiday #friend #photos #didn’t

Dear Maninder, I hope

this

letter finds you in best of the spirits and radiant health. I am writing

this

letter to thank you for the holiday pics that you sent me yesterday. I would

also

use

this

opportunity to thank you for the warm and friendly hospitality from you and your family during my stay with you. I could not write

you

Change preposition

to you

show examples

earlier because of a few reasons.

Firstly

, upon my arrival, I was occupied in

Correct pronoun usage

my search

show examples

for a job and

finally

Add a comma

finally,

show examples

I got one.

Moreover

, my mother was

also

hospitalised

due to

an acute stomach infection and I was too busy

Change preposition

apply

show examples

taking care of her.

However

, I still cherish the time we spent together and yesterday, when I saw the pictures sent by you, I decided to write

you

Change preposition

to you

show examples

. In fact, I would like to invite you and your family to come and stay with us during

Correct article usage

the next

show examples

winter holidays. As it would give me an opportunity to host you and spend some quality time with everyone. I hope you will give

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

wise consideration to

this

proposal. I am looking forward to hearing from you. Yours lovingly, Jatinder.

Submitted by mrsdns on Wed Aug 21 2024

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grammar

In your letter, try to avoid minor grammatical mistakes like 'best of the spirits' (it should be 'best of spirits') and 'I could not write you earlier' (it should be 'I could not write to you earlier').

coherence

To further improve, ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. While your letter is clear and easy to follow, connecting words or phrases could enhance the overall flow.

structure

The letter is well-structured and follows a logical sequence of thanking, explaining, and inviting. Each paragraph handles a single idea effectively.

tone

The greeting and closing are warm and polite, fitting well with the friendly tone of the letter.

task completion

The task is fully completed, addressing all required points: thanking for the photos, explaining the delay in writing, and extending an invitation.

tone

The writing tone is friendly and appropriate for addressing a friend, making the letter engaging and personable.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

7 paragraphs

192 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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