In some societies, the number of crimes committed by teenagers is growing. Some people think that regardless of age, teenagers who commit major crimes should receive adult punishments. To what extent do you agree

#societies #crimes #teenagers #people #age #adult #punishments

It is believed that young

kids

who are involved in big

crimes

should be punished the same as adults without the concern of age. I completely agree with

this

because they should fear committing

crimes

and they think a hundred times before doing any

crime

that they will be held accountable for

this

. The main reason is that young ones will fear that if they are going to commit any

crime

then

they are going to be punished. They will not even think of doing a

crime

if they know the consequences.

For instance

, if

kids

are punished in the same way as adults, there will be a less number of

crimes

. They will think before doing any

crime

that they will get punished,

therefore

, they should not do any

crime

Moreover

, they should be punished to help the community safe. If there is no punishment for

crimes

, there will be a greater ratio of

crimes

, and the community will not be safe.For illustration, young

kids

copy each other’s actions. In my area, a child started stealing things and by watching him, other young

kids

started to steal things.

Furthermore

, they should be held accountable for their actions. If they are not held responsible for their

crimes

, they will do it again.

For example

, in Lahore, a young kid killed his brother and he didn’t get any punishment for killing. In

this

way, he gained confidence and committed

crime

again.

Submitted by sajeehulzamans on Fri Aug 23 2024

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introduction conclusion present

Your introduction presents a clear standpoint on the issue, but it would be stronger if you provided a brief outline of the main points you intend to discuss.

introduction conclusion present

Your essay would benefit from a clear conclusion that summarizes your main points and restates your opinion in light of the arguments presented.

relevant specific examples

While your ideas are comprehensive, integrating a few more specific examples or statistics would make your arguments more compelling.

complete response

You have clearly stated your viewpoint and reasons for your stance, which successfully addresses the prompt.

logical structure

Your essay is logically structured with distinct paragraphs for each main point.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

240 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Juvenile delinquency
Rehabilitation
Adolescent development
Impulsive behavior
Criminal justice system
Deterrence
Recidivism
Moral reasoning
Developmental psychology
Restorative justice

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In some societies, the number of crimes committed by teenagers is growing. Some people think that regardless of age, teenagers who commit major crimes should receive adult punishments. To what extent do you agree

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do you think the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

In some culture children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disavdantages of giving children this message?

Although parents are responsible for raising a child, outside influence plays a key role in their development. To what extent do you agree or disagree?