Many feel that going to the gym is the best way to stay it. Others think there are more effective methods. Discuss both view and give you own opinion.

#gym #methods

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While

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some

people

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believe that going to the

gym

Use synonyms

is the best way to stay fit, others argue that there are more effective alternatives.

This

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essay will analyse both points of view and express my opinion. On the one hand, some

people

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think that going to the

gym

Use synonyms

is the most effective method because it helps in losing weight, building muscles and enhancing

people

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’s outer appearance.

In other words

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, it improves blood circulation and heart rate which contributes to building new cells for both the skin and the muscles.

For example

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, recent research has proven that

people

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who tend to

exercise

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in the

gym

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more regularly, have better shape and are less affected by the ageing process.

In addition

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, they can benefit from personalized trainers who give them special workout timetables and they cannot get these special tips rather than going to the

gym

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On the other hand

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, some

people

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prefer other effective measures.

First,

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they consider losing weight by having fewer calories in their diet,

for example

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, they stopped having bread and sugary food and drinks.

Moreover

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, they prefer doing their

exercise

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home

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rather than going out, which is more convenient for them.

For example

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, the widespread of videos and YouTube channels for

home

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exercise

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resulted in many

people

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using them to

stay in

Verb problem

maintain

show examples

a good physical appearance. In conclusion, the preference for going to the

gym

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rather than using other methods

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

relies on increasing body fitness and having personalized trainers.

Moreover

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, others prefer

have

Fix the infinitive

to have

show examples

low-calorie

Correct article usage

a low-calorie

show examples

diet or

exercise

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home

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. In my opinion, I believe a combination of

gym

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workouts and

home

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exercises,

along with

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a balanced diet, is the most effective approach to staying fit."

Submitted by hazarbakhit on Fri Aug 23 2024

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task response

Ensure all parts of the task are fully addressed. This includes a clear and balanced discussion of both views and a personal opinion. The essay somewhat leans more towards explaining the gym side rather than balancing both views equally.

coherence cohesion

Work on integrating linking words and phrases smoothly to enhance the flow of arguments. Some transitions between ideas are abrupt.

supported main points

Expand on the examples provided to make them more specific and relevant. This will help to better illustrate your points and provide a stronger argument for both views.

introduction conclusion present

The introduction clearly states the topic and outlines the essay's structure. It prepares the reader effectively for what is to come.

introduction conclusion present

The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and provides a well-balanced personal opinion.

clear comprehensive ideas

The essay contains clear and comprehensive ideas, with each view adequately addressed.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

279 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Physical well-being
prime option
structured exercise routines
professional equipment
fostering an environment
motivation and discipline
counter-argument
outdoor activities
home workouts
cost-effectiveness
social and emotional satisfaction
team sports
hybrid approach
holistic approach
comprehensive benefits

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Many feel that going to the gym is the best way to stay it. Others think there are more effective methods. Discuss both view and give you own opinion.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

In many countries around the world , rural people are moving to cities ,so the population in the country side is decreasing Do you think it is a positive or a negative development

The number of plants and animals is declining. Describe the reason and suggest some solution.

Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change. Others, however, think that change is always a good thing. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.