At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

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Currently, statistics show there are a few countries with more adolescent populations than elders. Meanwhile, There are several

disadvantages

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to young populations, but I think the advantages are greater than the

disadvantages

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. I am of the opinion that having a young population has some advantages like transforming the industry into an innovative and efficient place.

For instance

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, there are varied startup trends that are growing in the industry

chain

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which include Inquisitiv juveniles. innovative young people in a country can lead to a productive supply

chain

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This

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chain

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can contrast in a higher quantity of goods and services, fewer costs of goods, and implementation of new ideas and strategies. These are the factors that can increase the GDP and economic index in a country.

On the other hand

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, there are a few

disadvantages

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with young adults, like less experience and great chances of errors that make a system fail. When an individual has less job-related experience there are additional costs for teaching them.

Also

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, their mistakes in manufacturing a product can’t be dismissed.

For example

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this

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can be seen in a country like Iran with a large amount of old population and immigrating their younger labourers to other continents. Their economy is inefficient, their products are full of errors and problems that affect their quality.

Furthermore

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, they are one of the low-income, GDP countries. in conclusion,

Although

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there are some negative points in young age society,

Change the capitalization

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strongly agree that the constructive effects are higher than

negative

Correct article usage

the negative

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ones,

such

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as an efficient, innovative supply

chain

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and few costs of goods and labour that can overcome the

disadvantages

Use synonyms

neginsepahvandSun Aug 25 2024

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task achievement

Your essay discusses both the advantages and disadvantages of having a young population and takes a clear stance. However, a more detailed exploration of both sides would strengthen your argument.

task achievement

Provide more specific examples to support your points. Your example about Iran was not very clear and could be elaborated further. Mention concrete startups or young firm successes where necessary.

coherence cohesion

While your essay is logically structured, work on providing clearer transitions between and within paragraphs. This will improve the flow of your ideas and make your essay more coherent.

coherence cohesion

Ensure every paragraph has a clear topic sentence that intuitively connects to your overall argument. This helps in maintaining the flow and making your logic clear to the reader.

language

Watch out for minor grammatical errors and typos, such as 'Inquisitiv' instead of 'inquisitive' and 'varied' instead of 'various.' Also, remember to capitalize 'i' to 'I' in the last sentence.

structure

Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

task response

You provide a clear argument and stance, that advantages of a young population outweigh the disadvantages.

task response

You included relevant points about innovation and efficiency brought by young populations, which strengthens your argument.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

267 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

demographic
workforce
productivity
innovation
skilled labor
social development
technology
dividend
competition
resources
social welfare
unrest
instability
healthcare
elderly care

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At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Earlier technological developments brought more benefits and changed the lives of ordinary people more than recent technological developments. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant example for your own knowledge or experience.

Governments investment in arts, music and theatre is a waste of money. Government should invest these funds in public services instead. To what extent do you agree with this statement.