In the future the main reason for going to the shopping mall will be for entertainment not to shop.Do you agree or disagree?

rely agree that in the future the main reason for going to the shopping
mall
will be for
entertainment
not to shop because the development of shopping online makes the development of shopping
malls
decrease.
However
, shopping
malls
can develop in other fields like
entertainment
,restaurant that make shopping always exist in modern society There are many disadvantages when you shopping at a
mall
.Sometimes you can’t find an item you need at the shopping
mall
and you need to find it in an online shop.You need to go to the shopping
mall
to buy an item but with shopping online you don’t need to do that you can buy it any time you want.In fact, shopping online always has a better price than in shopping
malls
sometimes on a special day like Christmas or New Year there is a big discount for some items.All of the disadvantages can make a shopping
mall
bankrupt, which is why shopping
malls
need a transform shopping
mall
are not crucial they focus on
entertainment
much more than selling items.
Entertainment
is necessary for everyone so the shopping
mall
has developed more
entertainment
facilities.They have cinemas,bowling alleys,restaurants…Now people can enjoy shopping at
malls
with friends and play some games at shopping
malls
making shopping
malls
more and more developed. I strongly believe that shopping
malls
can’t disappear because they are always following trends and they know how to make the shopping
mall
always attract people.There will always be a place for shopping
malls
although
shopping online increasingly developed
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You have addressed the topic and presented a clear opinion, but elaborating more on your main points with additional specifics and real-life examples will strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
While your essay has a logical flow, some parts need clearer transitions between ideas. Using connective words and phrases will help improve coherence and make your essay smoother.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and you effectively develop this idea with supporting details. Consistency in structure will improve overall coherence.
task achievement
You have expressed a clear viewpoint and structured your essay into paragraphs, which is great.
coherence cohesion
Your essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, providing a good framework for your argument.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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