IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

There is more and more outrage and anger common in society today. Why is this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

#outrage #anger #society #development
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In
this
fast changing
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fast-changing
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 world
people
faces
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face
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 multiple emotional and social problems among which outrage and anger are the concerning ones. I believe there are many social factors attached to the cause which
i
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I
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 will discuss in
upcomming
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upcoming
 paragraphs.
Firstly
, the pressure of existence and standing out from the crowd could be the major reason
of
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for
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 one's
outragious
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outrageous
 behaviour. The competition in today's time has increased significantly and being successful is getting even tougher.
Also
, success stories prevail in
the
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apply
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society leading to
comparision
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comparison
as well as
 demotivation. In
such
mental
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a mental
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state
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state,
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 even small things
triggers
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trigger
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 a lot of
people
 and one can easily
loose
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lose
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 his calm.
Moreover
, technological advancement in
field
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the field
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 of communication plays a major role. The capabilities of being
annonymous
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anonymous
as well as
 being able to comment instantly leads to a lot
misjudgement
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of misjudgement
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 and unstructured thoughts leading out in the society.
People
 reacting impulsively in
heat
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the heat
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 of the moment could be totally different online, where there is no one to claim for and offline, where there are other factors like background, reputation and justification involved. In my opinion,
overall
 it is
an
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a
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 negative development in
the
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apply
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society. Outrage and anger not only
affects
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affect
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 the mental state of the
people
 involved but
also
 is a major reason for multiple health concerns.
In addition
, it
also
 affects the relations of
people
 making it more delicate.
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task achievement
In the introduction, clearly outline the reasons for the increase in outrage and anger, and provide a brief overview of whether you consider this to be positive or negative.
task achievement
Ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea and is not overly vague. Specific examples and supporting evidence should be provided to illustrate your points more clearly.
coherence cohesion
Enhance the logical flow of your essay by ensuring that each paragraph logically follows from the one before it.
coherence cohesion
Use a variety of cohesive devices to enhance the flow of your essay. Avoid repetition and ensure you are linking your ideas smoothly.
task achievement
The essay addresses the prompt accurately, discussing both the causes and the implications of increasing outrage and anger in society.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
language use
Good use of language to express ideas clearly and effectively.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Outrage culture
  • Amplification
  • Economic hardship
  • Sensationalist
  • Polarization
  • Constructive outcomes
  • Social frustration
  • Divisiveness
  • Societal norms
  • Historical context
What to do next:
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