IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

Nowadaysn teenagers are suffering from a lot of pressure.Write an esay of about 250 words to list the causes of teen pressure and give solutions to overcome?

#nowadaysn #teenagers #pressure #esay #list
In
this
 contemporary world,
young
Add an article
the young
show examples
 generation
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 suffering from peer
pressure
.
This
 has been debated by social professionals and there are
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
 of questions than solutions.
This
 essay will examine the causes and solutions of
this
 development
drimental
Correct your spelling
detrimental
. The primary real reason why young offspring are getting
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
 of
pressure
 is because there is
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
 of
pressure
 among them.The desire
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 competition has left
this children
Change the determiner
this child
these children
show examples
 with
exshaustion
Correct your spelling
exhaustion
.The reason
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 wanting to become on top of everyone in school has driven others to be depressed. Parents are
also
 causing
this
pressure
 as they want to see better results coming from schools. There is a good reason why social warfare
want
Change the verb form
wants
show examples
 to intervene
this
Change preposition
in this
show examples
stressing
Replace the word
stressful
show examples
situation
 as other
teenages
Correct your spelling
teenagers
 are ending up with mental illness
because
Add the preposition
because of
show examples
those
Change the determiner
that situation
those situations
show examples
situation
. To tackle
this
 escalating
situation
is to
Verb problem
we must
show examples
 put people with social professional skills
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
front
Add an article
the front
show examples
 to solve
this
 complex development.Social workers can educate parents and
gurdians
Correct your spelling
guardians
how
Change preposition
on how
show examples
 to foster their offspring.The community
also
 need to
undrstand
Correct your spelling
understand
 that every child has different intellectual skills as
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
 are fast learners and
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
 are slow learners.Collaboration is another key feature that can help.
For instance
,
teenages
Correct your spelling
teenagers
 can given tasks that they can work
as
Change preposition
on as
show examples
 a team and it
an
Correct your spelling
can
show examples
 help to solve
this
 pressing issue. In conclusion,
The
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
skilled professionals should be front
ruuners
Correct your spelling
runners
 to
this
situation
.The implementation of collaboration and education given to parents can help to ease the
pressure
 that the
teenages
Correct your spelling
teenagers
 are facing.
Submitted by leonellzhuwao on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure that paragraphs are structured logically with clear topic sentences and sufficient supporting details.
task achievement
Work on developing your ideas in more depth and provide specific examples to support your points.
task achievement
Check for grammatical errors and improve sentence construction to enhance readability.
task achievement
You have identified some key causes and solutions for the problem of teenage pressure.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points discussed in the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • **Academic Pressure**: competition, prestigious, workload, counseling services
  • **Social Media Influence**: digital literacy, anxiety, self-esteem, boundaries, offline activities
  • **Family Expectations**: unrealistic self-expectations, open communication, realistic goals, emotional support
  • **Peer Pressure**: fit in, accepted, risky behaviors, supportive environment, coping mechanisms, extracurricular
  • **Economic Pressures**: financial constraints, part-time jobs, financial aid programs, stress management workshops
What to do next:
Look at other essays: