Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words

#people #music #cultures #ages

Some believe that

people

of various ages and cultures can gather through

music

. I strongly agree with

this

opinion. In

this

essay, I will present my point of view.

To begin

with,

music

is a universal language, so humans do not need to know the lyrics or the melody. Songs attract not only children but

also

older

people

. Indeed, for one, adolescents may like the rhythm of the

music

without the notion of the meaning. For another, older adults might prefer to find the song's meaning, and both groups enjoy the same

music

;

for example

, my little sister and grandfather both like the same

music

and dance with each other.

Likewise

according to

songs, creating a memorable time for them has connected them to two different ages and created a strong bond.

In addition

, the

music

industry has no borders, so

music

belonging to an unknown musician in Brazil can easily attract

people

all over the world;

for example

, I attended a festival two years ago in Paris, and I saw many

people

dancing together. They might

also

not understand the lyrics.

Besides

, dancing to

music

led to making new friends from different backgrounds. In conclusion, I firmly believe that it does not matter how old we are or which culture we have; what matters is that

music

can connect

people

through its magic.

Submitted by sarataklimi89 on Tue Aug 27 2024

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coherence and cohesion

Ensure that your main points are consistently well-supported throughout your essay. This means that each idea should be clearly elaborated upon to avoid any gaps in your argument.

introduction and conclusion

Your introduction and conclusion are clearly presented, which helps to frame your argument effectively.

clear and comprehensive ideas

Your ideas are clear and comprehensive, showing a thorough understanding of the topic.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

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Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

224 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

universal language
evoke
connect
diverse audiences
cultural exchange
generational gaps
shared experiences
unifying force

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Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people believe that a crime is a result of social problems and poverty, others think that crime is a result of a bad person’s nature. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people believe that tourism promotes the economy while other argue that tourism destroy the environmental. Discuss both views.

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people prefer to eat at food stands or restaurants. Other people prefer to prepare and eat food at home. Which do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

What are the advantages and disadvantages of using computers in education system?