It is important for people to take risks, both in their proffessional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweight the disadvantages?

#people #risks #lives #outweight

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It is considered by many that taking

Use synonyms

risk

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risks

show examples

is important

their

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in their

show examples

proffessional

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professional

lives

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and their personal

lives

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. I think, if they take

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risk

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risks

show examples

in their

lives

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, they have

chance

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a chance

the chance

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for

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apply

show examples

face to new and beneficial opportunities. So I believe that

benefits

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the benefits

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of taking risks

outweight

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outweigh

the drawbacks. There are several

way

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ways

show examples

to take

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risk

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risks

show examples

in our

proffessional

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professional

lives

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For instance

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, in contemporary times, corporate

people

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tend to

quite

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quit

show examples

their

job

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jobs

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and try to become

entrepreneur

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entrepreneurs

show examples

due to

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long working hours and bad

salary

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salaries

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. It is a big

risk

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for

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this

Correct determiner usage

these

show examples

people

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generally

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generally,

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they

have

Verb problem

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not

enough

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have enough

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starting capital or business experience, so they might

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

bankrupt their companies.

However

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, if they reach their aims, there are so many good things

that

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apply

show examples

waiting for them.

Firstly

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, if they increase their income, it is good for their both mental and physical

healt

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health

Secondly

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, they be able to make

investment

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investments

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more simply, they might help their parents,

they

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and they

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might

saving

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save

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money for their future children.

On the other hand

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, we may take

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risk

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risks

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in our personal

lives

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For example

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, there are so many

people

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who I know going to

foreign

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a foreign

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country and

change

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changing

show examples

their

job

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jobs

show examples

completely different area. Being

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show examples

immigrant person

also

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have

include

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included

show examples

some risks. They

not

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are not

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able to talk like

native

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a native

show examples

person

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people

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and there might be some lingual barrier

with

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between

show examples

domestic

people

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and immigrant

people

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However

Linking Words

, if they survive

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apply

show examples

the developed countries, they earn

high value

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high-value

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money with a good salary. It

affect

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affects

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also

Linking Words

people

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's retirement

lives

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too. If they save enough money for their elderly period, they live

comfortable

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comfortably

show examples

and would not

relly

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rely

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on somebody.

To sum up

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, I believe that

benefits

Correct article usage

the benefits

show examples

of taking risks

outweight

Correct your spelling

outweigh

the drawbacks. Because if they never try to be

Add an article

a more

the more

show examples

competitive person in their life, they

propbly

Correct your spelling

probably

live

same

Correct article usage

the same

show examples

life every day.

Submitted by berivan_yilmazz on Tue Aug 27 2024

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task achievement

Review your spelling and grammar to avoid errors such as 'proffessional' instead of 'professional'.

coherence cohesion

Use clearer topic sentences to introduce each main point. This will improve the logical structure of your essay.

task achievement

Further elaborate your examples to ensure they fully support your points. For instance, detail how becoming an entrepreneur can lead to various positive outcomes.

coherence cohesion

You have provided a clear introduction and conclusion that frame your essay effectively.

task achievement

Your essay has some relevant and specific examples that illustrate your points well.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
45
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

300 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

opportunity
growth
innovation
achievement
comfort zone
security
failure
success
uncertainty
challenges
decision-making
courage
calculated risks
consequences
fear
regret

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It is important for people to take risks, both in their proffessional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweight the disadvantages?

Few people devote time to hobbies nowadays. Say why you think this is the case and what effect this has on the individual and society in general. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people believe that social media sites, such as Facebook or Twitter, have a negative impact on young people and their ability to form personal relationships. Others believe that these sites bring people together in a beneficial way. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Computers and AI technology are increasingly being used for online education. Can AI enhance the learning experience? Is this a positive or negative development

Today food often travels thousands of miles from the farm to the consumer. Some people believe it would be better for the environment and the economy if people only ate food produced by local farmers. Would the advantages of this idea outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people work for the same organisation all their working life. others think that it is better to work for different organisations. discuss both these views and give your own opinion.