young people who commit crimes should be treated in the same way as adults? To what expand do you agree or disagree?

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Some people believe that it is better to

be behaved

Wrong verb form

behave

show examples

with youth committing

crime

Fix the agreement mistake

crimes

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similar to

adults

Use synonyms

However

Linking Words

, I strongly disagree with

this

Linking Words

statement and have the opinion that treating these young differently from

adults

Use synonyms

is often advocated for several reasons. The first reason why I refuse

this

Linking Words

developmental

Correct article usage

the developmental

show examples

differences between

juvenile

Fix the agreement mistake

juveniles

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and grown-ups. Young people are still in the process of developing;

hence

Linking Words

, their brains are not fully developed, particularly in areas related to decision-making

as well as

Linking Words

understanding long-term consequences.

In other words

Linking Words

, they may not completely comprehend the severity of their actions as

adults

Use synonyms

. By recognizing these developmental varieties, the justice system can

as a result

Linking Words

focus on rehabilitation rather than punishment, helping young offenders learn from their mistakes.

Secondly

Linking Words

, in order to

treating

Change the verb

treat

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young offenders

similar

Change the word

similarly

show examples

to grown-ups can have long-lasting negative impacts on their future. A criminal record can severely limit a young person's opportunities for education, employment, and so on. In

this

Linking Words

regard, the government provide them with a second chance to build a positive future.

Moreover

Linking Words

, when they

expose

Wrong verb form

are exposed

show examples

this

Linking Words

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

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, not only are young

criminal

Fix the agreement mistake

criminals

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more productive, but

also

Linking Words

the society is safer.

Therefore

Linking Words

, it causes reintegrate into society as productive members, reducing the likelihood of reoffending. In conclusion, recognizing the developmental differences or concentrating on rehabilitation and considering the long-term impact on young offenders' futures are crucial reasons for treating young people who commit crimes

variousely

Correct your spelling

variously

from

adults

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

approach not only benefits the individuals involved but

also

Linking Words

contributes to a safer and more just society.

ielts7683Wed Aug 28 2024

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relevant specific examples

Try to include more specific examples or cases to strengthen your arguments. This will make your essay more convincing.

clear comprehensive ideas

Work on sentence variability and complexity to enhance readability and flow. Varied sentence structures can make your essay more engaging.

introduction conclusion present

Your introduction and conclusion are clear and effectively frame your argument.

complete response

Your essay presents a well-reasoned argument and stays focused on the topic throughout.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

257 words

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young people who commit crimes should be treated in the same way as adults? To what expand do you agree or disagree?

Government investment in the arts, such as music and theatre, is a waste of money. Governments must invest this money in public services instead. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people think that the media has the right to publish details of people’s views, while others think it should be controlled. Discuss both views.

some people think that competition at work, at school, in daily life is a good thing. others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Education should be accessible to people of all economic backgrounds. All level of education, from primary to tertiary school should be free. To what extent do you agree or disagree?