IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

As the internet becomes more popular, newspapers are becoming a thing of the past. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? (re)

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As the
internet
Use synonyms
 continues to grow in popularity, it is often argued that
newspapers
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 are becoming increasingly obsolete. I strongly agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement, as the
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internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
 offers unparalleled convenience and real-time
information
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 that traditional
newspapers
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 cannot compete with. One of the primary reasons
newspapers
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 are being overshadowed by the
internet
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 is the latter’s ability to provide instant access to
information
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. In today’s fast-paced world,
people
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 demand up-to-the-minute
news
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, which the
internet
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 delivers effortlessly. Unlike
newspapers
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, which are published once a day, online
news
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 platforms update continuously, ensuring that readers are always informed of the latest developments.
For instance
Linking Words
, financial markets are highly dynamic, and investors rely on real-time data to make informed decisions. A delay in receiving
this
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information
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, as is the case with
newspapers
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, could result in significant financial losses.
Therefore
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, the
internet
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’s real-time updates make it a superior source of
information
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 for many.
Furthermore
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, the
internet
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 has revolutionized how
people
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 consume media. With the rise of smartphones and other portable devices, accessing
news
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 has never been easier.
People
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 can browse
news
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 articles, watch live broadcasts, and even interact with journalists through social media platforms, all from the convenience of their own homes or
while
Linking Words
 on the go.
This
Linking Words
 level of accessibility is something
newspapers
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 simply cannot offer.
Moreover
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, the interactive nature of online media allows for a more engaging and personalized experience,
further
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 diminishing the appeal of traditional
newspapers
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. In conclusion,
while
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newspapers
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 have played a crucial role in disseminating
information
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 in the past, they are now being eclipsed by the
Use synonyms
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
. The instant access to
information
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,
coupled with
Linking Words
 the convenience and interactivity that the
internet
Use synonyms
 offers, makes it the preferred choice for most
people
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 today. As
such
Linking Words
, it is not surprising that
newspapers
Use synonyms
 are becoming a thing of the past.

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task achievement
Your essay does an excellent job of responding to the task with a clear stance. Be sure to continue providing specific and relevant examples to support your points, as you've done here.
task achievement
Your ideas are clear and comprehensive, but make sure to balance them throughout the essay by giving equal weight to each supporting point.
coherence cohesion
Your logical structure is well-organized. To further improve, consider using more transitional phrases to ensure the smooth flow of ideas from one paragraph to the next.
coherence cohesion
You have an effective introduction and conclusion that clearly frame your argument and provide a sense of closure.
coherence cohesion
Your main points are well-supported with relevant and specific examples.
task achievement
The essay comprehensively addresses the task and provides a complete response.
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