The average standard of people's health is likely to be lower in the future than it is now. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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Many

people

Use synonyms

have an opinion that as time progresses, the average standard of an individual's

health

Use synonyms

will deteriorate in comparison to what it is now.

This

Linking Words

essay aims to substantiate

this

Linking Words

assertion. Despite the advancements in the medical field, we have observed that the proportion of unhealthy

people

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has significantly increased in the past decades. One of the most significant contributing factors is

Correct article usage

the sedantary

show examples

sedantary

Correct your spelling

sedentary

lifestyle, which is becoming more popular every day.

People

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prefer to stay indoors and watch television,

instead

Linking Words

of going out for a walk. Even children nowadays prefer to play video games, rather than

going

Wrong verb form

show examples

out and

playing

Wrong verb form

play

show examples

sports. A recent study was done, where a cohort of school students were asked, if they knew how to play football on their PlayStations, and in real life. It was surprising to note that most of them could play it virtually, but very few knew how to play football on a field.

This

Linking Words

study proves that

people

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have become extremely lazy, and

consequently

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suffer from severe

health

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problems, like obesity, atherosclerosis, weakening of eyesight, and many more. Another factor that contributes to the decrease in

health

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standards is unhealthy eating habits and food trends. There is an increased popularity of fast and processed food, which leads to

people

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not getting the required nutrition.

Moreover

Linking Words

, it is not just

the

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apply

show examples

fast food, but

also

Linking Words

fruits and vegetables are treated with chemicals, which undoubtedly decreases their nutritional value. In a recent survey, demographics showed that

majority

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the majority

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of the global population suffers from at least one or two vitamin or mineral deficiencies. The lack of proper nutrition contributes

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show examples

weakening

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the weakening

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of our immune system, which makes our body susceptible to various infections and diseases. In conclusion, I completely agree that with time,

Use synonyms

health

Correct article usage

the health

show examples

standards of the human population will decrease because lack of physical exercise and proper nutrition are the two fundamentals to attain a healthy body and mind, which are lacking

from

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show examples

our current lifestyles.

khushichhillarSat Aug 31 2024

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task achievement

To improve the task response, consider adding a counter-argument. This helps demonstrate a balanced perspective.

coherence cohesion

Ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly into the next, and consider using more linking words and phrases to aid coherence.

task achievement

Provide more specific examples or evidence to substantiate points fully.

task achievement

The introduction clearly outlines the main idea of the essay.

task achievement

Relevant examples, like the study on children playing football, are well-integrated into the argument.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a logical structure with clear paragraphs, an introduction, and a conclusion.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

324 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

1. Standard of health
2. Average
3. Lower
4. Future
5. Aging population
6. Chronic diseases
7. Sedentary lifestyle
8. Lack of exercise
9. Poor dietary habits
10. Environmental pollution
11. Technological advancements
12. Impact on health

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The average standard of people's health is likely to be lower in the future than it is now. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Your opinion

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Many governments invest a great deal of money in space research. What are the advantages and potential disadvantages of spending money on space exploration?