Today, the quality of life in large cities is decreasing. Discuss the causes and solutions. What are the primary causes of the quality in life? What solutions can you suggest to improve the quality in life?

Rapid industrialization and urbanization from the beginning of
this
century have drastically changed the urban landscape and brought unprecedented possibilities and opportunities – but not without the cost of declining living standards for city dwellers. In my opinion, exponential community growth and unplanned urbanization are the primary reasons for
this
declining level of satisfaction and comfort.
However
, proper urban planning, investing in public transport and offering government subsidies could be some effective solutions. The prosperity and opportunity in the big metropolis have attracted a huge number of people and the inrush of the population to mega cities all around the world paradoxically made life difficult for all. With the ever-increasing inhabitants, cities become costly, competitive, polluted and chaotic. Growing competition increases property rent, makes employment more difficult and increases traffic congestion.
For instance
, My neighbour, Mr Smith, who used to live in a luxury apartment for years, is compelled to resettle to a much smaller flat in a slum owing to serious redundancy in the labour force resulting in a cutback in working hours and wages. Some crucial amenities
such
as blocks of flats should be planned and subsidized by the central government to ease the depression. The gradual expansion of unconnected, unequal scattered downtown without sustainable development has several effects. It might lead to significant environmental problems
such
as air pollution, heat islands, and urban climate issues.
Additionally
, rapid urbanization can create severe economic, and social problems, including traffic congestion, and social exclusion. Vinh city is one of the primary examples, different schools built over 20 years are located so close together in one high street causing heavy congestion during peak hours. Decentralization of metropolitan cities could be another effective solution to decrease the ever-increasing community in the metropolis by relocating administrative authorities and other relevant services to properly planned zones. In conclusion, a wealthy city attracts public inflows which
then
cause pressure on the existing quality of life. a number of solutions mentioned above can help mitigate
such
drawbacks.
Submitted by aesacademyforenglishstudy on

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coherence cohesion
Your essay provided a structured response with an identifiable introduction and conclusion, which is good. However, the logical flow between ideas needs improvement. Try to link sentences and paragraphs more clearly using a range of cohesive devices.
task achievement
While there is an attempt to address the question and you mentioned some good points, the essay partially answered the prompt by mostly discussing causes and only briefly touching on solutions. To achieve a higher score, fully explore your ideas with a balanced approach and ensure that both components of the task (causes and solutions) are addressed with equal measure.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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