IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The graph below shows the number of inquiries received by the Tourist Information Office in one city over a six-month period in 2011. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the number of inquiries received by the Tourist Information Office in one city over a six-month period in 2011. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The line chart displays the number of questions collected by the Tourist Information Center in a particular area, in a span of six months during 2011.
Overall
Linking Words
, the general trends
shows
Change the verb form
show
show examples
 that the information that was obtained through face-to-face or by telephone made a dramatic increase.
Where as
Correct your spelling
Whereas
show examples
, by letter or email it showed a major decline.
Also
Linking Words
, the majority
prefered
Correct your spelling
preferred
 to go in
person
Use synonyms
 than by calling or writing. As per the results, in
Use synonyms
person
Add a comma
person,
show examples
figure
Use synonyms
 was the most popular pick as it showed an
increase
Change the verb form
increased
show examples
 rate. Starting just above 400 until June where it peaked
the
Change preposition
at the
show examples
 highest
amongs
Correct your spelling
among
amongst
 all lines and reached over 1800.
In addition
Linking Words
, the telephone
figure
Use synonyms
 showed a
flucuation
Correct your spelling
fluctuation
 between January and March which lead to be constant until April. The graph shows in the
last
Linking Words
 two months the
figure
Use synonyms
 increased rapidly.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
letters
Correct article usage
the letters
show examples
 or emails
figure
Use synonyms
 demonstrates
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 slow decrease in the first three months. In May and
June
Add a comma
June,
show examples
 there was an unchanging rate. As the graph illustrates, people
prefered
Correct your spelling
preferred
 going in
person
Use synonyms
 than writing an email.
However
Linking Words
,
in
Add a hyphen
in-person
show examples
person
Use synonyms
 began as the lowest rate and it eventually became the
highest demand
Add a hyphen
highest-demand
show examples
 pick.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words person, figure with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 5 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "information" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Inquiries
  • Tourist Information Office
  • Overall trend
  • Sharp increase
  • Gradual decline
  • Peak
  • Fluctuation
  • Outnumbered
  • Dominated
  • In-person inquiries
  • By telephone
  • By letter/email
  • Correspondence
  • Interpersonal
  • Communication method
  • Popularity
  • Comparison
  • Tourism season
  • Visitor engagement
What to do next:
Look at other essays: