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Band 6.5

Wild animals have no use in the 21st century and trying to preserve animals now is just a waste of resources. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#animals #st #century #waste #resources
The natural habitats of wild
animals
 and their way of life have been greatly affected by human activities, and in my opinion, we should try to take and initiate every possible step to save these wild
animals
. So, I disagree that
animals
 in the wild serve us no purpose in modern times, and trying to save them is a waste of money and resources.
This
 essay explains why. The 21st century does not mean that we have to alter the way of nature and destroy the planet. The lives of these wild
animals
 have been endangered because of humans and some
species
 are on the verge of extinction. If necessary steps are not taken immediately, many of these
species
 will be lost forever. Humans need those
animals
 to preserve nature and save the planet. To keep the balance of the ecosystem, each
species
 of the animal kingdom plays important roles and the existence of one
species
 largely depends on another. To say that wild
animals
 have no use for us is just a selfish statement and obviously, we should try to keep the natural balance for our benefit.
For example
, many wild
animals
 kill lots of rats and save the farmers' crops from being eaten or destroyed by those rats. So if we kill those
animals
, we will have to suffer. In conclusion, we must try to preserve all the endangered and natural
animals
 and as humans, we should feel responsible to ourselves not to let any
species
 be lost forever. Those wild
animals
 maintain biodiversity and help us live in a perfectly balanced world
Submitted by moon2014angel on

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task achievement
Try to include more specific examples to strengthen your arguments, illustrating your points with concrete evidence or real-life instances.
coherence cohesion
Though the essay has a clear structure, ensure that each paragraph flows smoothly to maintain cohesion. Use cohesive devices effectively to link ideas between sentences and paragraphs.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction clearly presents a thesis statement that disagrees with the opinion, setting up the essay's argument effectively.
introduction conclusion present
Your essay includes a conclusion that succinctly summarizes the main points, reinforcing your stance on the issue.
complete response
The essay stays focused on the task throughout, addressing the prompt with relevant points and maintaining a clear position against the opinion stated.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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