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Band 7.5

Economic progress is often used to measure a country’s success. However, some people believe that other factors are more important. What other factors should also be considered when measuring a country’s success? Which one do you think is the most important?

#progress #measure #country’s #success #people #factors
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While
 economic growth is one of the most prominent measures of the government's development, other indicators could
also
 be considered progress. there are numerous factors, so I will describe the main ones in the essay. There are three main factors;
First,
a high literacy rate and quality education system contribute to the country's
overall
 development and innovation capabilities.
This
 measure consists of diversity and well-developed universities that provide ideal conditions for every individual to have sufficient education,
therefore
 government's accessibility to the professional workforce will be increased.
Second,
the healthcare system and
overall
 well-being of the country's residents are the keys to success. It is obvious that with a high percentage of healthy society, governments will be able to have better management.
Third,
effective management of natural resources is another measurement of development. Energy is a vital item for continuing life,
therefore
, by considering
this
 fact and managing its use, governments will succeed.
On the other hand
, I believe that the third factor is the most important one, because of global warming and the limitation of energy resources. The countries which use environmentally friendly resources will be more successful in the future. They will be able to combat climate change and overcome some deficiencies in energy. It is a good approach to consider the upcoming situations on our planet.
Additionally
, being prepared for unpredictable conditions is a crucial matter. In conclusion,
however
, the economic indicators present the range of success in countries, the other main factors
such
 as healthcare and educational systems are important measures to consider a country as a successful one.
Submitted by ostorr7213 on

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task achievement
Try to make your introduction more engaging and succinct. For example, you could incorporate more context about why economic growth is often viewed as the primary measure of success.
coherence cohesion
In the body paragraphs, be sure to connect your supporting points more explicitly to the main topic. For example, elaborate more on how a high literacy rate directly impacts a country's innovation capabilities.
task achievement
You successfully included multiple factors other than economic progress that are important for a country's success, like education, healthcare, and natural resource management.
coherence cohesion
Your essay displays a logical structure where you introduced your main points early on, then elaborated on them in separate paragraphs.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • economic progress
  • measure of success
  • literacy rates
  • quality education systems
  • healthcare services
  • life expectancy
  • well-being
  • environmental sustainability
  • natural resources
  • climate change
  • social equality
  • inclusiveness
  • equal opportunities
  • rights
  • harmony
  • housing
  • work-life balance
  • safety
  • leisure opportunities
  • overall happiness
  • political stability
  • governance
  • transparency
  • cultural heritage
  • sense of identity and belonging
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