Some people believe that culture will be ruined if it is used to earn tourism revenue, but others consider that tourism is the only way of protecting a culture. Discuss both sides and give your opinions. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

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Culture, a way of life, the general customs and the very beliefs of people,

without

Change preposition

apply

show examples

doubt that it’s an important aspect. Certainly being the backbone for one’s lifestyle and possibly future, culture needs to be

preversed

Correct your spelling

reversed

preserved

. But is it the right way to do so through

tourism

Use synonyms

? To initiate, it allows people of different religions and continents to learn about the values of these cultures available around the globe,

In addition

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

also

Linking Words

tourists are able to

enchance

Correct your spelling

enhance

their knowledge about the

authenic

Correct your spelling

authentic

and traditional food of a state or a country.

Morever

Correct your spelling

Moreover

tourism

Use synonyms

helps in increasing

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

revenue which could help to maintain the cultural

heritages

Fix the agreement mistake

heritage

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However

Linking Words

tourism

Use synonyms

does have

it’s

Replace the word

its

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negative effects on the culture.The first point is an

increased

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increase

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tourism

Use synonyms

could

load

Correct your spelling

lead

show examples

loss

Correct article usage

the loss

show examples

of traditional values.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, visitors could seriously damage the environment and the cultural destination, by throwing

trashes

Correct subject-verb agreement

trash

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and causing

pollutions

Fix the agreement mistake

pollution

show examples

, or even drawing graffiti on the heritage.

Finally

Linking Words

, both cultural and natural resorts have

Correct article usage

the

show examples

potential to

be vanished

Wrong verb form

vanish

show examples

due to

Linking Words

over-exploitation

Correct article usage

the over-exploitation

show examples

of unique

landscape

Fix the agreement mistake

landscapes

show examples

and national heritage to commercialize, building their own brand in

tourism

Use synonyms

in order to catch

attention

Add an article

the attention

show examples

of tourists. In conclusion, despite giving an immense

finanical

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financial

supportin

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support in

supportin'

supporting

conserving, it put cultures into jeopardy at the same time. Though we don’t know which one will overcome the others, it’s certain that the

adventages

Correct your spelling

advantages

have the

upperhand

Correct your spelling

upper hand

Submitted by lyhuongclc on Sat Sep 07 2024

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task response

Ensure your introduction clearly outlines both sides of the argument. This will help set the stage for your discussion. Consider starting with a more engaging hook to capture the reader's attention.

coherence cohesion

Organize your paragraphs more effectively. Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and flows logically into the next. Use transition words and phrases to help guide your reader through your argument.

task response

Use specific examples to illustrate your points. This will not only strengthen your argument but also make your essay more engaging and credible.

coherence cohesion

Be cautious of grammar and spelling errors. For instance, 'enchance' should be 'enhance,' and 'authenic' should be 'authentic.' While minor, these errors can interrupt the flow of your writing.

task response

Conclude with a concise summary of both sides and clearly state your own opinion. This will leave the reader with a strong understanding of your perspective.

task response

Focus on developing each point more fully. Provide more detailed explanations and examples to support your arguments. This will make your essay more compelling and comprehensive.

coherence cohesion

Proofread your work to avoid minor errors, such as 'could load to loss' should be 'could lead to the loss,' and 'trashes' should be 'trash.' Such mistakes can detract from your overall message and coherence.

task response

Your essay has a balanced discussion of both sides of the argument, which shows your ability to consider multiple perspectives.

coherence cohesion

You have identified key points regarding the benefits and drawbacks of tourism on culture, demonstrating a clear understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
22
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

226 words

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In a number o f countries, some people thin k it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

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Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.