Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development

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Nowadays, many

children

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are engaged in using their

smartphones

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This

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is because

this

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technology

widespread

Add a missing verb

is widespread

show examples

and needed. I firmly believe that it is an advantageous development only if don't use it excessively .

This

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essay will provide several reasons to support

this

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argument. With advancements in the contemporary world, many people even

children

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can access

smartphones

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. These devices become an integral part of our lives, so without them, it would be difficult to maintain our daily routine. For

children

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this

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could be a positive phenomenon if their parents monitor them . They can enhance their

knowledge

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with

smartphones

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For instance

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, I used to read online books on my smartphone , when I was a child.

This

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increased my

overall

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general

knowledge

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Therefore

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smartphone

Fix the agreement mistake

smartphones

show examples

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

beneficial for those interested in gaining valuable

knowledge

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Moreover

Linking Words

smartphones

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are essential for education. There are many online teachers who teach for free. To get benefits from all these amenities, they must be involved in the usage of

smartphones

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properly.

Also

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, in schools, we should allow

children

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to use their

smartphones

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to fulfil some tasks more practically compared to paper-based ones

such

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as taking notes or making calculations on their

smartphones

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Thus

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, for better quality of education, new technologies should be adopted for the usage of

children

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at school. In conclusion,

due to

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recent progress that has been made in technology, many

children

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can access and use

smartphones

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This

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is vitally important for their daily lives. Through control by their parents, they should utilize

this

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device to receive new

knowledge

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and for their study.

Smartphones

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are significant for the betterment of education and student's academic development.

Yasar KhanSat Sep 07 2024

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task achievement

Try to strengthen your main points with more concrete and varied examples to make the argument more compelling.

coherence cohesion

Ensure the ideas in each paragraph have smooth transitions to enhance the logical flow, making the essay easier to follow.

grammar

Ensure consistent and accurate use of articles and prepositions to improve readability and overall writing quality.

task achievement

The introduction clearly states the topic and the writer's position, setting a strong foundation for the essay.

coherence cohesion

The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and reiterates the writer's stance, providing a satisfying end to the essay.

task achievement

Usage of personal examples, like the mention of reading online books, adds a personal touch and relevance to the essay.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

270 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

smartphones
usage
technology
accessibility
convenience
entertainment
gaming
social media
communication
educational resources
addiction
dependence
negative effects
physical health
mental health

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Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development

Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

More people shop, work and communicate via the internet instead of face-to-face communication. Is it positive or negative?

Some people believe that all wild animals should be protected. Others say that few wild animals should be protected instead. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

In many countries, young people decide to leave their parents home once they finish school. They start living on their own or sharing home with friends. Do you think this is a positive or negative development.