6.Nowadays celebrities earn more money than politicians. What are the reasons for this? Is it a positive or negative development?

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As a result
, is social media and the internet, celebrities' profiles increased as have their
income
sources. In fact, many professionals profile more earnings, even political public
figures
. In
this
essay, I will examine two main reasons for
this
and explain why I feel
this
situation is a positive one. Two key factors contributed to the heavier salaries of famous
people
. The first reason is that social platform is a big
income
for public
figures
, like advertising and
content
promotion. Celebrities contact the company; Product advertising is the main agreement because most of the public uses the Internet. The second is that in politics famous
people
in main earning countries have big project contracts by the government,
for example
, road construction, which is work for most of the
people
so they are salaries are not the same but politician shows that by the government all of the salaries are same. So,
this
is a big profit by an unethical source. There are,
however
, in modern-day politics men
income
lawless rather than famous
figures
. Advertise
income
just nearly ethical because there are lots of exercises and different angles before the social platform live. TV shows and
content
creation,
for instance
, there was a lot of knowledge shared to create
content
they should final version and prepare the record after all processes are complete on publication. Celebrities earn more complicated if
this
platform's number of
people
work. so, there is a big difference in
income
sources politically more than higher
income
public
figures
. In conclusion,
as a result
of an improved mindset and more focus on
content
making it was good earning and politicians
people
are increased
income
by government and other activities. I am of the opinion that it is a positive development because
people
often get threatened by their online
income
rather than politics.
Submitted by nikhilnath1996 on

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task achievement
To improve task achievement, it is essential to develop ideas more clearly and provide more detailed explanations and examples.
task achievement
Ensure that all parts of the question are addressed thoroughly. In this essay, you could discuss more about why higher earnings for celebrities would be positive or negative for society.
coherence cohesion
The essay would benefit from a more logical structure. Start by clearly outlining your main points in the introduction, and then discuss each point in separate paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
Work on the flow of sentences and paragraphs to make your essay more cohesive. Use linking words and phrases to connect ideas smoothly.
introduction
The introduction sets up the essay's direction by stating that the reasons for the higher earnings of celebrities will be examined and that it's a positive development.
supported main points
The essay attempts to support its main points with examples, such as the role of social media and advertising for celebrities.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • endorsements
  • revenue streams
  • global presence
  • diversified branding
  • income sources
  • free-market principles
  • market value
  • government budgets
  • public funds
  • public perception
  • value generation
  • bureaucratic
  • consumer spending
  • economic implications
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