Celebrities’ Private Lives Some people feel that the private lives of celebrities should not be openly shared by the media. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is argued that the celebrity´s
life
is always in the public record and under the spotlight.Of course
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
social
media
enables celebrities to maintain a continuous presence in the public eye.
This
essay totally agrees that famous
people
have their private
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
which should be away from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social
media
and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
public
life
. Stars are human so they have the right to their privacy. Everyone deserves a
boundry
Correct your spelling
boundary
between their public
life
and private
life
. In fact , the
media
should focus only on the achievements and skills of famous
people
.
Hence
the intense focus on
celebrities´private
Correct your spelling
private
lives sometimes can contribute to stress,anxiety and other mental health issues for
this
Change the determiner
this person
these people
show examples
people
even for the
families´members
Correct your spelling
families
.
This
can be harmful especially when
media
coverage crosses into harassment or exploitation.
For example
,in my country,one of the
fame
Replace the word
famous
show examples
star
Change to a plural noun
stars
show examples
was followed
by
Change preposition
on
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social
media
with her family.They started to spread the
rumors
Change the spelling
rumours
show examples
and they turned her and the whole family into a smear campaign,her
life
was turned into hell.
For
this
reason
Add a comma
reason,
show examples
she has decided to place restrictions on her privacy and
safe
Replace the word
save
show examples
her family.
On the contrary
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social
media
plays a significant role in the lives of famous ,they could not
being
Wrong verb form
be
show examples
famous without
intervention
Add an article
the intervention
show examples
of networks.Celebrities themselves may benefit from the
media
spotlight,
it
Correct word choice
as it
show examples
helps them to achieve their careers and public profiles.
Aditionnally
Correct your spelling
Additionally
,
celebreties
Correct your spelling
celebrities
are often
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
public figures who
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
have
choosen
Correct your spelling
chosen
to be
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
the center stage to reach their goals and improve their professional
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
sush
Correct your spelling
such
as their contributions to film, music, or
other field
Change the wording
another field
other fields
show examples
.Many
people
are interested in their
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
and follow their news and their professional achievements through the
media
.The
media
coverage can reflect
this
public curiosity. In conclusion, celebrities are human and they have their private
life
which should not be shared with the public
life
.
As well
Rephrase
Also
show examples
the role of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social
media
is to respect
this famous
Change the determiner
this famous person
these famous people
show examples
people
and concentrate only on the parts of achievements and
carreers
Correct your spelling
careers
career
carriers
.
Submitted by janejaspar on

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supporting examples
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task response
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supporting examples
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The essay employs a logical structure, separating different points into paragraphs.

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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