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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people think that zoos are cruel and should be closed down. Others, however, believe that zoos can be useful in protecting wild animals. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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Some would argue that
zoos
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 must not exist because
animals
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 should be free and not in cages. Other people think that
zoos
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 are good places to give shelter to feral
animals
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. I believe that
zoos
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 are not necessary at these times to see
animals
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 enclosed. On one hand,
zoos
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 are not necessary to see
animals
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 in cages just for human entertainment. Nowadays, there are many TV shows and documentaries where people can watch
animals
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 in freedom in their habitats. In fact, with the advent of the internet, it is possible to find out about different
animals
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 without the necessity to go to a place to see
animals
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 suffering because they are not in their environment. In Buenos Aires’s Zoo, there was a polar bear in bad conditions because the pool with cold water and cage was not enough to keep the bear healthy and welfare expectations of life. In my opinion, these kinds of
animals
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 should not stay enclosed in a park in the middle of the city because it is cruel.
On the other hand
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
zoos
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 could be used as a reserve for
animals
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 in danger, to protect them and reproduce them. There are many projects to protect hurt or hunted
animals
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. Even though using those areas for reproduction and to free
animals
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 to nature. in Argentina there are two projects to save wild
animals
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, in Iguazu Park reserve where biologist ecologists and veterinarians work together to protect the jaguar, and in Buenos Aires’s Zoo where the staff is working hard to reproduce the Andean Condor. I believe that
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 is how
zoos
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 must be used and not as
a
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
human fun. In conclusion,
zoos
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 are cruel and used as human entertainment.
However
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, are extremely useful if they were used as a reproduction station and as a refuge for
animals
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 in danger.

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introduction
Enhance the introduction by clearly stating your opinion alongside the main points you're going to discuss. This ensures the reader is well-guided from the start.
coherence
Work on the logical flow within and between paragraphs. Ensure each idea seamlessly connects to the next, enhancing overall readability.
supported main points
Support points with more specific examples or data where possible. This can make your argument more compelling and grounded.
conclusion
Your conclusion is effective in summarizing your main points and restating your opinion clearly.
task achievement
You did a good job discussing both viewpoints, presenting balanced arguments on the topic.
relevance
The examples provided, such as the polar bear in Buenos Aires and the projects in Argentina, enhance the relevance and specificity of your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • animal welfare
  • conservation
  • captive breeding
  • habitat
  • ethical issues
  • zoochosis
  • endangered species
  • genetic diversity
  • reintroduction programs
  • wildlife education
  • sanctuary
  • natural living conditions
  • artificial environments
  • behavioral enrichment
  • ecosystem
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