Some people say that now is the best time in history to be living. What is your opinion about this? What other time in history would be interesting to live in?
People
have argued that we are living in an excellent time
in history
. This
essay is pessimistic about this
view because of immense global conflicts; however
, the best time
to live in would be the age of artificial general intelligence.
Humanity faces an unprecedented challenge due to
global disputes in every corner of the world. That is
why we can argue that we are not living in a great time
of history
. Moreover
, every nation is competing to secure more of the natural resources and lands themselves while
others defend their own territory against this
indulgence. However
, this
results in conflict and global war in many countries. For example
, in the last
five years, the war between Russia and Ukraine claimed millions of lives and forced migration to neighbouring countries.
The best time
that this
essay argues would be in the age of artificial general intelligence. Where people
will hand over most of the challenging tasks to intelligent machines, and these intelligent machines will reduce the need for resources to compete for; moreover
, creating smart lives and streamlining livelihood will bring down the tension in the minds of many people
, which results in a happier life. For example
, when AGI helps humans to produce sustainable energy for their factories and homes, they will never invade other nations for that resource.
In conclusion, it is an argument among the people
that now is the prime time
to live in history
, but with current conflicts around the world, it does not seem to be an appealing argument; however
, if we look from a future perspective, the great time
in history
would be the age of artificial general intelligence, where machines will take care of all of our work.Submitted by am.edrees on
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task achievement
The essay would benefit from a stronger introduction that clearly outlines the main arguments that will be discussed in the essay, providing a clear roadmap for the reader.
coherence cohesion
To strengthen coherence, ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and that ideas are linked smoothly from one sentence to the next. This will improve readability and flow.
task achievement
While the examples provided are relevant, it would be useful to integrate more specific examples and evidence to further strengthen the arguments being made.
coherence cohesion
The essay presents a clear structure, with a distinct introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. This is crucial for achieving high marks in coherence and cohesion.
task achievement
The arguments are supported with relevant examples, such as the reference to the Russia-Ukraine conflict, which helps to illustrate points effectively.
task achievement
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points discussed and reiterates the essay's stance, which is important for achieving a high score in task response.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?