Some people think the increasing and cultural contact between countries brings many positive effects. Others say it causes the loss of national identities. Discuss both the views and give your opinion.

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Globalization has brought a great opportunity for many
countries
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to have
a
Correct article usage
apply
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cross-cultural development.
While
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some people believe that increasing cultural contact between
countries
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causes the loss of national identities, I,
however
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, agree with those who think that it brings many positive effects. On the one hand, cross-cultural between
countries
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may pose two main drawbacks in the loss of national identities. One major
issues
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issue
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is the excessive amounts of other cultural exposure, influencing
personal
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the personal
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life
stye
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style
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and
behavior
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behaviour
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of each
individuals
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individual
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.
This
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will
effected
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be effected
effect
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towards the local environment in various ways,
for instance
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, new outfit styles and eating habits. The local producers
impacted
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are impacted
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since the indigenous cultures will disappear slowly as the generation will transformed
in
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into
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only new
culture
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cultures
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. In turn,
this
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will lead to social tensions.
Moreover
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, individuals exposed to multiple cultures may face confusion regarding their own identity, values, and beliefs. They might feel torn between maintaining their cultural heritage and adapting to a dominant or globalized culture.
On the other hand
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, I agree with those who believe that
the
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apply
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increasing
of
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apply
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cultural contact can
offers
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offer
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several benefits.
Firstly
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, exposure to different cultures allows individuals to develop a broader understanding of the world, increasing awareness and appreciation of cultural diversity.
This
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fosters empathy and tolerance towards others' beliefs and practices.
Furthermore
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, when people from different cultural backgrounds collaborate, they bring unique viewpoints and problem-solving approaches.
This
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diversity stimulates creativity and leads to innovative solutions, especially in multinational corporations or research fields. In conclusion,
while
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cultural exposure from other
countries
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may influence different
lifestyle
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lifestyles
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and
behavior
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behaviors
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and confusion regarding their
owh
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own
identity,
it
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its
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benefits
has
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apply
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outweight
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outweigh
outweighed
the drawbacks. Not only it will develop a broader
knwoledge
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knowledge
, but
also
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it
stimulate
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stimulates
show examples
creativity to better critical thinking.
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on

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grammar
Ensure that all sentences are grammatically correct and free of spelling errors. Specifically, pay attention to the use of tenses and subject-verb agreement. For example, 'The local producers impacted since the indigenous cultures will disappear slowly as the generation will transformed in only new culture' should be revised for better clarity and correctness.
examples
Try to include more specific examples to support your main points. This will strengthen your arguments and make your position clearer.
clarity
Focus on improving the clarity of your ideas. Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all supporting sentences are relevant to that idea.
content
The essay presents a balanced view of both sides of the argument, which is crucial for a high score in task response.
structure
The introduction and conclusion are clearly stated, which helps to provide structure to the essay.
strength
Your point about cultural exposure fostering empathy and tolerance is particularly strong and well-argued.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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