Most people are not interested in how their food has been produced. They only care about how much it costs. How true is this statement? What influences people when they buy food?

Food
is arguably one of the primary things that humans need. Nowadays, there are many processed
foods
that one can find easily because it is believed to be the easier and cheaper option.
However
, as far as I am concerned,
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
show examples
of
people
now prioritize their
health
more compared to their wealth. The general view has been that as long as it is tasty and cheap,
people
will buy any
foods
Fix the agreement mistake
food
show examples
that sellers offer. Clearly, maintaining a healthy nutritious diet will lead you to a healthier body. Having said that, healthier
food
tends to be more expensive.
People
with low or limited income will only care about being full, despite
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the drawbacks. Interestingly,
people
become more aware that consuming too
much processed
Add a hyphen
much-processed
show examples
food
will take a toll on your body and worsen your
health
in the future.
People
realized
Wrong verb form
realise
show examples
that if you
did
Wrong verb form
do
show examples
not maintain your
health
and eat more unhealthy
food
, your
health
will decline and you will eventually get sick. In today’s economy, being ill can
also
be quite costly.
Therefore
, most
people
choose to watch their diet (
eventhough
Correct your spelling
even though
it costs more) in order to stay healthy and prevent spending more money in the future
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
hospital
Fix the agreement mistake
hospitals
show examples
. There are several reasons why
people
choose to buy some
food
, some of the main reasons include the taste and nutritional value. The
food
’s taste is arguably one of the main reason why someone
decide
Change the verb form
decides
show examples
to buy
foods
Fix the agreement mistake
food
show examples
. It is inevitable that you will try to find some delicious
foods
when you go to a new place or location. In fact, there are some common
believe
Replace the word
beliefs
show examples
in Korea that if you eat good meals, you are having a good life.
Therefore
, some parents in Korea will say something like “
are
Capitalize word
Are
show examples
you having good meals nowadays?” to their children,
instead
of asking “
how
Capitalize word
How
show examples
are you?” to ask about their
child
Change noun form
child's
show examples
conditions
Fix the agreement mistake
condition
show examples
. The other reason may
due
Add a missing verb
be due
show examples
to the nutritional value of the
foods
we consume. There are actually some
people
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
portioning
Wrong verb form
portion
show examples
their nutritional balance for the day, like protein,
vitamin
Fix the agreement mistake
vitamins
show examples
, and
carbohydrate
Fix the agreement mistake
carbohydrates
show examples
that they eat. More
people
realized that
besides
being healthy, you
also
need to watch your nutritional balance to maintain your body shape.
Overall
, most
people
in modern days realize that it is not just the
food
cost that they need to worry about. They
also
need to care about how their
food
has been processed because it will affect their
health
,
while
also
consider
Wrong verb form
considering
show examples
the taste and nutritional value. I believe that price is not the main concern when
people
buy their
food
anymore. 426 words
Submitted by raymond.sebastianvl on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
While your essay presents a coherent argument, ensuring more specific examples can strengthen your points further. Try to provide quantifiable data or references to studies when possible.
coherence cohesion
To improve logical structure, make sure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. Using transitional phrases can help guide the reader through your essay.
introduction conclusion
Your introduction effectively sets up the topic and presents a clear stance on the matter, making it easy for the reader to follow your argument.
supported main points
You have effectively supported your main points with logical reasoning, which helps in maintaining the reader’s interest and makes your essay more compelling.
introduction conclusion present
Your conclusion neatly wraps up the discussion and reinforces your main argument, providing a sense of closure.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: