Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe that they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

t is argued by some people that
professionals
like doctors and engineers, ought to
work
in the
country
where they did their practises,
while
others think that they should have freedom to choose a
country
where they desire to
work
.
This
essay will discuss both points of view and the fact that the former opinion is not the best approach,
whereas
giving
professionals
the right to decide their workplace is a better choice. For
professionals
, working in the
country
where they constructed
theoretical
Correct article usage
a theoretical
show examples
academic background and gained practical experience may be straightforward and beneficial because they already
had became
Wrong verb form
have become
show examples
familiar with the
country
.
However
, some
countries
do not have vast job opportunities and good working conditions and
this
situation leads
professionals
to
work
in other
countries
.
According to
a study which is published by MarketResearch.com, 75% of Indian software engineers migrate to Europe
for working
Change preposition
to work
show examples
because of India’s poor job opportunities.
Furthermore
, brain drain is
also
important for global development because some
countries
do not have sufficient manpower to
work
as
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
professional
Fix the agreement mistake
professionals
show examples
. To address
this
problem, they have to transfer well-educated and enthusiastic people from other
countries
to serve the
country
. Owing to that, they can improve their
country
in a good way.
According to
the
Germany
Correct your spelling
German
show examples
labour market report from EURES highlighted that 60% of the working population consists of individuals from different nationalities In conclusion,
although
working for
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
familiar
country
might be easy and advantageous for professional people, they should have
independenceindependency
Correct your spelling
independence independence
independence independency
to choose and
work
for the
country
that they are eager to
work
for.
Submitted by silaaltundag5 on

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task achievement
Your essay presents a balanced discussion of both views, which is essential for achieving a higher band score. However, to improve further, ensure that all points are clearly developed and explained. Some ideas, such as the ease of working in a familiar country, could be expanded with more detailed examples or explanations.
coherence cohesion
Work on improving your grammar and vocabulary; while the main ideas are clear, there are several minor grammatical errors and awkward phrasings that can detract from the overall quality of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Enhance your logical flow by using a greater variety of linking words and phrases. This will help to clearly guide the reader through your argument and ensure each point is well-connected to the next.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction is clear and effective, outlining the main points that will be discussed in the essay.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion effectively summarizes the arguments presented and clearly states your own opinion.
supported main points
You provide relevant specific examples, such as the study about Indian software engineers and the Germany labour market report, which add weight to your arguments.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • professionals
  • doctors
  • engineers
  • required
  • training
  • home country
  • cultural
  • linguistic
  • advantages
  • economic impact
  • free
  • another country
  • globalization
  • international collaboration
  • improving
  • skills
  • knowledge
  • experience
  • opinion
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