Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe that they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
t is argued by some people that
professionals
like doctors and engineers, ought to work
in the country
where they did their practises, while
others think that they should have freedom to choose a country
where they desire to work
. This
essay will discuss both points of view and the fact that the former opinion is not the best approach, whereas
giving professionals
the right to decide their workplace is a better choice.
For professionals
, working in the country
where they constructed theoretical
academic background and gained practical experience may be straightforward and beneficial because they already Correct article usage
a theoretical
had became
familiar with the Wrong verb form
have become
country
. However
, some countries
do not have vast job opportunities and good working conditions and this
situation leads professionals
to work
in other countries
. According to
a study which is published by MarketResearch.com, 75% of Indian software engineers migrate to Europe for working
because of India’s poor job opportunities.
Change preposition
to work
Furthermore
, brain drain is also
important for global development because some countries
do not have sufficient manpower to work
as a
Correct article usage
apply
professional
. To address Fix the agreement mistake
professionals
this
problem, they have to transfer well-educated and enthusiastic people from other countries
to serve the country
. Owing to that, they can improve their country
in a good way. According to
the Germany
labour market report from EURES highlighted that 60% of the working population consists of individuals from different nationalities
In conclusion, Correct your spelling
German
although
working for the
familiar Correct article usage
a
country
might be easy and advantageous for professional people, they should have independenceindependency
to choose and Correct your spelling
independence independence
independence independency
work
for the country
that they are eager to work
for.Submitted by silaaltundag5 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
Your essay presents a balanced discussion of both views, which is essential for achieving a higher band score. However, to improve further, ensure that all points are clearly developed and explained. Some ideas, such as the ease of working in a familiar country, could be expanded with more detailed examples or explanations.
coherence cohesion
Work on improving your grammar and vocabulary; while the main ideas are clear, there are several minor grammatical errors and awkward phrasings that can detract from the overall quality of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Enhance your logical flow by using a greater variety of linking words and phrases. This will help to clearly guide the reader through your argument and ensure each point is well-connected to the next.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction is clear and effective, outlining the main points that will be discussed in the essay.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion effectively summarizes the arguments presented and clearly states your own opinion.
supported main points
You provide relevant specific examples, such as the study about Indian software engineers and the Germany labour market report, which add weight to your arguments.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!