In many countries today, if people want to find work, they have to move away from their friends and their families. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.
Work
helps to develop the nation's economy and also
work
provides a balanced life
for the people. In some countries, people want to find work
for a living so they have to move away from their friends and families. This
will help us to find the advantages and disadvantages of work
.
Work
makes life
happy and also
it helps to develop the nation and family. So people need to find a job to lead a happy life
and for this
, they need to move to another place by leaving their friends and families in the present or up to 5 years of work
in another place and after the work
time finished there means they can arrive to their native area and start a business for themself. First leaving their home town makes them sad but in future, it makes them happy in their life
and they can provide employment for others helps to develop the country's economy. For example
, an individual travels frequently between countries for work
, often on a fixed basis and it helps them to earn more.
Finding a job in another area makes them get irritated but they have to be calm until getting proper work
. Getting work
means they need to survive at work
and also
need to make extra for others but their main problem is feeling lonely, thinking about their family and friends this
makes them feel regretful in present and also
they need to focus on work
and avoid this
homesickness this
makes to get develop in future. For example
, they have to readjust their life
in the working area and they feel insecure there but they have to adjust to it.
In conclusion, the advantages of working in other places will give them experience and help them to face any situation in their life
and also
help them to make some hard decisions in their life
but the disadvantages make them immoveable in life
so the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.Submitted by insighttribez on
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coherence cohesion
Your essay presents a logical structure and introduces the topic well. However, it would benefit from clearer paragraphing. Each main point should be in a separate paragraph, and those paragraphs should have clear topic sentences that summarize the main idea.
task achievement
Ensure each point is well-supported with relevant examples. The examples provided are somewhat generic; more specific, detailed examples would strengthen the arguments.
task achievement
Make sure to fully explain the advantages and disadvantages before weighing them against each other in the conclusion. This will help provide a more balanced response.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion effectively frame the essay, clearly stating the main idea and summarizing your stance.
task achievement
You have a sound understanding of the need to balance discussing both advantages and disadvantages.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?