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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people believe that there should be a fixed punishment for each type of crime. Others, however, argue that the circumstances of an individual crime, and the motivating of committing it should always be taken account when deciding on the punishment. Discuss both of these views and give your opinion

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Debate whether fixed sentencing should apply to all crimes or individual circumstances should be considered before any action has been ongoing for a long time.
While
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 some advocate for pre-written penalties to promote a sense of fairness and consistency, others argue that human
behavior
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behaviour
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 is too complex;
therefore
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, making a decision is not easy.
This
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 essay will explore both perspectives before offering my idea.
Firstly
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, advocates of fixed punishments believe that standardized and certain sentences contribute to the thriving of equality under the law. Inappropriate and injustice penalties decline as there are assigned ways to confront each crime,
such
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 as theft and kidnapping.
Therefore
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, it serves as an effective deterrent and ensures offenders are treated equally.
Furthermore
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, fixed punishments help organize legal processes by removing lengthy trials and saving time and resources.
On the other hand
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, critics argue that varied and complex factors are deep within the conditions in which crime occurs and that
this
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 requires careful consideration.
For example
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, a person driven to steal
due to
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 extreme poverty whose aim was to feed his/her family should not face the same consequences as other criminals.
This
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also
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 includes conditions where crimes take place as an action of self-defence or
as a result
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 of unstable mental health, which highlights the need for precise consideration. In conclusion,
Although
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 fixed sentences can enhance efficiency and consistency by providing a sense of security to society, the lack of flexibility and comprehension of human complexity can not be overlooked.
Thus
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, a balanced approach, a combined guideline of perspectives,
general
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and general
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 sentencing with judicial discretion, would work better in harmony to ensure that all verdicts are delivered after considering the unique circumstances of each case.

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task achievement
You have done a commendable job presenting both views and offering a well-rounded conclusion. However, try to provide a bit more depth on each perspective by adding additional examples or elaborating on the ones you have provided.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is generally coherent, but you may want to ensure smoother transitions between sentences and paragraphs. This will make your writing flow even better and enhance readability.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction clearly states the topic and effectively sets the stage for discussing both viewpoints. This helps the reader understand what to expect from the essay.
relevant specific examples
Your essay presents specific examples, such as the individual driven to steal due to poverty, that illustrate the points effectively. This bolsters your argument and engages the reader.
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