In some countries, owning a home than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be in the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative solution?

In many countries, buying a house is crucial for
for
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
some people. In
this
eassay
Correct your spelling
essay
, the reasons behind
this
notion will be explored
along with
the several negative impacts of
this
approach.
To begin
with, there are many reasons for owning a home. The primary factor is asset
property
, as it
provide
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provides
show examples
both
accomodation
Correct your spelling
accommodation
and sustainable financial profit.
While
owned
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an owned
show examples
house has
increase
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increased
show examples
in value
overtime
Correct your spelling
over time
show examples
, renting one results in an increase
expense
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in expense
show examples
over
month
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a month
the month
show examples
.
For example
,
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the accomodation's
show examples
accomodation's
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accomodation
show examples
market
nowdays
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nowadays
show examples
is
constat
Correct your spelling
constant
show examples
expanding, resulting in
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
higer
Correct your spelling
higher
price for selling in the future. Another significant reason is heritage
purpose
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purposes
show examples
. Most
parent
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parents
show examples
those
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apply
show examples
planning to have children usually prepare
an
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a
show examples
living space for their children in the future and
gives
Correct subject-verb agreement
give
show examples
this
property
to their offspring as a valuable gift.
However
, there are negative consequences
associted
Correct your spelling
associated
with
this
current trend
such
as financial failure in those who
has
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have
show examples
lower income. Buying an expensive
property
without careful thinking could result in economic
issue
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issues
show examples
, leading to an increase in debt and
unsustainable
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an unsustainable
show examples
future for
family
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the family
show examples
.
Due to
long term
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long-term
show examples
installment
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instalment
show examples
,
leader
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the leader
show examples
of
family
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the family
a family
show examples
might need to work harder
for gaining
Change preposition
to gain
show examples
more revenue, which can cause both mental and psychical health problems including stress, depression, office syndrome and other serious health issues.
Moreover
, loss of flexibility to move is
significant
Add an article
a significant
show examples
negative impact for someone who
have
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has
show examples
to
rellocate
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relocate
reallocate
frequently
due to
their job purpose.
For instance
,
businessman
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businessmen
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or pilots
which
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
required
Wrong verb form
require
show examples
working
abord
Correct your spelling
abroad
show examples
for many years are not suitable for
this
trend. In conclusion, many people want to own a home rather than
renting
Replace the word
rent
show examples
because of several reasons
such
as asset
property
, heritage purpose and being a gift for their children.
However
,
this
trend has potential drawbacks including financial issues and loss of liquidity. Ultimately, I firmly believe that buying a house
causing
Wrong verb form
causes
show examples
drawbacks outweigh
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
show examples
.
Submitted by sippakorn.wet on

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clear comprehensive ideas
Ensure that spelling and grammatical errors are minimized. Words such as "eassay," "provide," "constat," and "higher" need correction.
logical structure
Make sure to maintain a consistent and logical structure. While the essay is mostly cohesive, certain points can be better linked for smoother transitions.
supported main points
Develop the examples and explanations further to support the main points more comprehensively.
clear comprehensive ideas
Be mindful of redundancy and avoid unnecessary repetition. For example, "buying a house causing drawbacks outweigh advantages" can be streamlined for clarity.
introduction conclusion present
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which provides a good framework for the discussion.
complete response
The reasons for owning a home are clearly mentioned and explained, such as asset property and heritage purpose.

Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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