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Writing Samples
Band 7

The chart below shows the number of trips made by children in one country in 1990 and 2000 to travel to and from school using different types mode of transport. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the number of trips made by children in one country in 1990 and 2000 to travel to and from school using different types mode of transport. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The graph illustrates the
number
Use synonyms
 of
children
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 in a country
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
 to school using different means of transportation in 1990 and 2000.
Overeall
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Overall
, the increasing
number
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 of
children
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 went to school by car in 2000
whereas
Linking Words
 the popularity of other transport declined.
Traveling
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Travelling
show examples
 by car was the most common in 2000
although
Linking Words
 walking was the most dominant way in 1990. Starting from the transportation that
children
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 used in 1990, walking was by far the most common with more than 12
million
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.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, other methods do not show a significant change; the
number
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 of users of
buses
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 was slightly higher than cycling and walking and
buses
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 with just above 6
million
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 and just below 6
million
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 respectively.
In contrast
Linking Words
, cars were the least chosen by
children
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 from 5 to 12 as there were only approximately 4
million
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children
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. Turning to the graph for 2010, the
number
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 of those taken to school by car increased dramatically to reach the highest at about 11
million
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 in spite of it being the least common in 1990.
Conversely
Linking Words
, walking comes
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
second with 6
million
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children
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, showing the sharpest decrease for the two decades.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
buses
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 are less
popluar
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popular
 with about 7
million
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children
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, followed by walking and
buses
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 and cycling with approximately 3
million
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 and 2
million
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children
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 respectively, making the latter the least common.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words number, children, million, buses with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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