The dangers and complexities of the modern world have made the mobile phone an absolute necessity for children. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

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It is argued that mobile phones have become an unavoidable possession for

children

Use synonyms

looking at the intricacies and dangers of

this

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modern era. I completely agree with

this

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notion because of the safety and convenience that they bring to a child's life.

Firstly

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children

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have always been more susceptible to crimes like sexual assault, kidnapping and gun violence. With the super busy lives of most adults, it has become increasingly difficult for them to take care of their kids back home. Thanks to smartphones for their features like SMS, calling, sending live location updates etc, that can be used to track the activity of a child. Not only

this

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, the iPhone

additionally

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provides an option to alert all the contacts at the tap of a finger upon sensing any danger.

This

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can help shoo away the assaulters and receive help faster.

For example

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children

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can be on a continuous video call with their parents which can be recorded, anytime they are travelling down a lane alone. Imagine not having a tool as useful during

such

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a vulnerable moment.

Secondly

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, another important aspect of a child's life is to have access to unhindered education, be it in any form. It is very natural to have difficulty understanding some concepts or not be able to catch up to the speed of a tutor. Smartphones make it extremely easy for

children

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to watch a recorded lesson at their pace as many times as they want, at any place, any time of the day.

This

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would not be possible without owning a mobile phone. The different applications on them

also

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help them stay connected with their classmates for an interactive learning experience.

For example

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children

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can stay connected on a WhatsApp or Telegram group with their batchmates in order to access notes and all kinds of materials to study, ask doubts and learn from their peers. In conclusion, cell phones have become a total necessity for

children

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, not only to survive efficiently in

this

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complex world but

also

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to stay vigilant about the different kinds of threats imposed on them by modern society.

man3meet4Fri Sep 20 2024

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coherence cohesion

Consider using transitional phrases to further enhance the flow between paragraphs. This will make the essay even smoother to read.

task achievement

You might want to briefly address potential counterarguments. This will show a well-rounded understanding of the topic.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a well-structured introduction and conclusion, which provides a clear framework.

task achievement

You provided relevant and specific examples to illustrate your points, which strengthens your argument.

coherence cohesion

The logical structure of your essay is very strong, making it easy to follow.

task achievement

Your response is complete and covers multiple important aspects of the topic.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

349 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

absolute necessity
emergencies
GPS features
educational apps
online resources
social connectivity
social skills
tech-centric world
proficient
cyberbullying
inappropriate content
screen addiction
adverse effects
mental health
parental control apps
monitor
activities
distraction
academic performance
health concerns
eye strain
poor posture
sleep disturbances

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The dangers and complexities of the modern world have made the mobile phone an absolute necessity for children. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

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