Public transporation is essential but problematic. Describe soem of the problems connected to the public transportation and suggest some solutions.

Public
transportation
has been essential for everybody, but it is problematic. One of the problems
of
Change preposition
with
show examples
this
is that there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
a lot of
traffic
congestion
during the day, and the other issue is
air
pollution
. The possible solutions to these are that companies might offer to increase salaries if
employees
use
a
bicycle
, and
work
from
home
. One of the issues is
traffic
congestion
every day, so it is hard to move from point A to point B in pick hours.
Beside
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Besides
show examples
this
, it is difficult for people who have second
shift
Fix the agreement mistake
shifts
show examples
to get to their jobs because
traffic
congestion
increases after two pm.
As a result
, pick hours start
early
Rephrase
earlier
show examples
than expected because many of these workers decide to leave their homes early to be on time. Another issue is
air
pollution
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
might be causing lung diseases and allergies.
This
is causing many
lungs cancer
Fix the agreement mistake
lung cancers
show examples
, and more people are suffering from allergies and dry skin.
For instance
, in huge cities like New York, it is common to see a dark sky
due to
air
pollution
and a lot of
traffic
congestion
on the streets. One of the solutions is that companies might offer an increase
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
salary for those who
use
a
bicycle
to get to their jobs, so
this
might motivate
employees
to not
use
public
transportation
.
As a result
,
this
might decrease
traffic
congestion
and
air
pollution
. Another solution is that many
employees
might
give
Wrong verb form
be given
show examples
the opportunity to
work
from
home
, and
this
might reduce the
use
of public
transportation
as well. If these
employees
work
from
home
, they might not
use
a car during the weekdays, and
this
will reduce all the issues that public
transportation
brings. To illustrate
this
, the vast majority of China's
employees
use
a
bicycle
, so the city has less
pollution
because people have understood
this
is to protect the environment. In conclusion, there are many issues with public
transportation
like
traffic
congestion
and
air
pollution
,
however
, there are some solutions for these
such
as huge corporations might increase employee's salaries if they
use
a
bicycle
and give the opportunity to these
employees
to
work
from
home
.
Submitted by cuevas14dic on

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task response
Your essay provides a complete response to the task, addressing both problems and solutions effectively. However, some areas could benefit from more detailed explanations and examples. For instance, you mentioned that increased salaries for bicycle use could motivate employees, but it would be useful to explain how this could be implemented practically.
coherence cohesion
Ensure logical progression between sentences and paragraphs. While the overall structure is clear, some transitions could be smoother. For example, use linking words like 'moreover,' 'consequently,' or 'therefore' to create a better flow between ideas.
task response
Provide more specific examples to support your points. While you mentioned New York and China, giving more specific statistics or studies could strengthen your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion effectively summarize the main points, making your essay easy to follow.
task response
The essay addresses multiple issues related to public transportation and suggests practical solutions, showing a good understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
The paragraphs are well-organized, each dealing with a specific aspect of the issue, which helps maintain clarity.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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