Public transporation is essential but problematic. Describe soem of the problems connected to the public transportation and suggest some solutions.
Public
transportation
has been essential for everybody, but it is problematic. One of the problems of
Change preposition
with
this
is that there are
a lot of Change the verb form
is
traffic
congestion
during the day, and the other issue is air
pollution
. The possible solutions to these are that companies might offer to increase salaries if employees
use
a bicycle
, and work
from home
.
One of the issues is traffic
congestion
every day, so it is hard to move from point A to point B in pick hours. Beside
Replace the word
Besides
this
, it is difficult for people who have second shift
to get to their jobs because Fix the agreement mistake
shifts
traffic
congestion
increases after two pm. As a result
, pick hours start early
than expected because many of these workers decide to leave their homes early to be on time. Another issue is Rephrase
earlier
air
pollution
that
might be causing lung diseases and allergies. Correct pronoun usage
which
This
is causing many lungs cancer
, and more people are suffering from allergies and dry skin. Fix the agreement mistake
lung cancers
For instance
, in huge cities like New York, it is common to see a dark sky due to
air
pollution
and a lot of traffic
congestion
on the streets.
One of the solutions is that companies might offer an increase of
salary for those who Change preposition
in
use
a bicycle
to get to their jobs, so this
might motivate employees
to not use
public transportation
. As a result
, this
might decrease traffic
congestion
and air
pollution
. Another solution is that many employees
might give
the opportunity to Wrong verb form
be given
work
from home
, and this
might reduce the use
of public transportation
as well. If these employees
work
from home
, they might not use
a car during the weekdays, and this
will reduce all the issues that public transportation
brings. To illustrate this
, the vast majority of China's employees
use
a bicycle
, so the city has less pollution
because people have understood this
is to protect the environment.
In conclusion, there are many issues with public transportation
like traffic
congestion
and air
pollution
, however
, there are some solutions for these such
as huge corporations might increase employee's salaries if they use
a bicycle
and give the opportunity to these employees
to work
from home
.Submitted by cuevas14dic on
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task response
Your essay provides a complete response to the task, addressing both problems and solutions effectively. However, some areas could benefit from more detailed explanations and examples. For instance, you mentioned that increased salaries for bicycle use could motivate employees, but it would be useful to explain how this could be implemented practically.
coherence cohesion
Ensure logical progression between sentences and paragraphs. While the overall structure is clear, some transitions could be smoother. For example, use linking words like 'moreover,' 'consequently,' or 'therefore' to create a better flow between ideas.
task response
Provide more specific examples to support your points. While you mentioned New York and China, giving more specific statistics or studies could strengthen your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion effectively summarize the main points, making your essay easy to follow.
task response
The essay addresses multiple issues related to public transportation and suggests practical solutions, showing a good understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
The paragraphs are well-organized, each dealing with a specific aspect of the issue, which helps maintain clarity.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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