Some people think people can exploit animals for any purpose they need, while others do not think so. Discuss both sides and give your opinion?
In the past, other creatures in
this
world below humans tended to be subject to their needs, and it is often argued that Linking Words
animals
should be traded to meet Use synonyms
people
's demands for goods or services, Use synonyms
while
some individuals believed it shouldn't be. Linking Words
This
essay will discuss both views and give my own opinion.
To commence with, Linking Words
animals
were the common subject to meet human needs because it has a lot of features that are suitable for Use synonyms
people
. Use synonyms
Although
, some Linking Words
people
will think Use synonyms
that is
animal cruelty sometimes it is Linking Words
also
for the betterment of some Linking Words
animals
. Use synonyms
For instance
, sheep wool is a very versatile natural material, which makes it a perfect candidate for all kinds of applications in the textile industry, and it is used to produce binnies, scarves, and garments. So, the process is what we call wool shearing, Linking Words
as a result
of that, the sheep will have a new smooth wool in the future.
Linking Words
Secondly
, other Linking Words
people
think that exploiting Use synonyms
animals
should not be allowed because it is against to Animal Welfare Act, and is animal abuse. Use synonyms
Moreover
, Linking Words
people
tend to abuse their power and sometimes Use synonyms
use
it on helpless creatures. Use synonyms
For example
, in some nations eating dogs is still a custom, Linking Words
this
animal is not for food but Linking Words
people
still do it.
In my opinion, alternatives should be studied to lessen the Use synonyms
use
of Use synonyms
animals
for human Use synonyms
benefits
. Fix the agreement mistake
benefit
Due to
overexploitation may lead to potential environmental consequences. Linking Words
Therefore
, individuals should be responsible have some empathy towards Linking Words
animals
, and Use synonyms
use
other resources to meet their needs and wants.
In conclusion, the balance between the Use synonyms
use
of Use synonyms
animals
should be observed for the betterment of society. Use synonyms
In addition
, the Government should take action to ensure the welfare of the Linking Words
animals
.Use synonyms
Submitted by alyssa.cordero22 on
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coherence cohesion
Make sure all points are fully developed with clear explanations and examples. Improve the transition between ideas in paragraphs for better flow.
task achievement
Check for minor grammatical errors and rephrase complex sentences to avoid ambiguity. Keep ideas concise and clear.
overall
Good attempt at addressing both sides of the argument and presenting a balanced view.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are effectively present and summarize the topic well.
task achievement
Relevant examples, like the one about wool-shearing, help illustrate the points effectively.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.