IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types of relationships people make? Is this a positive or negative development?

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In recent times,
technology
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 has changed the way
people
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 interact with one another. Professional
relationships
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 have been strengthened, and the bond between family members has been impacted positively by technological advances.
This
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 essay suggests that
such
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 a development is positive because it has fostered easy communication. Advancements in
technology
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 have helped working professionals extend their network online. With an email or a text message, an employee can reach out to similar experienced individuals for suggestions, which helps in building professional
relationships
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 over time.
Similarly
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, family
relationships
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 have
also
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 been strengthened through
such
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 online communications. Online tools to video call a friend or a family member have reduced the distance between
people
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 and their family separated by geographies.
For example
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, international students living in foreign countries, often stay connected with their parents through online video-calling services like Skype or Google Meet.
Furthermore
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,
technology
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 has made communicating with
people
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 so seamless that even demographical differences are slowly
getting
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being
show examples
 reduced all over the world. Online
softwares
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software
allow
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allows
show examples
people
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 to learn the languages of a foreign country completely for free, and sometimes, can even provide real-time translations to help better communicate with
people
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 having a different mother tongue.
For instance
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, the Duolingo mobile application provides their users with courses in languages like English, French and Spanish, which can be learnt at a person's own pace, which results in effective communication with non-native speakers. Considering
this
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, I believe
such
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 a development is positive. In conclusion, the way
people
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 interact with each other has changed in recent times
due to
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 improvements in the
technology
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 sector, that have helped
people
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 better their professional
as well as
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 family
relationships
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, and
that is
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 a positive scenario because it has made communication seamless.

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coherence cohesion
While your essay is structured well and includes a strong introduction and conclusion, aim to elaborate more on each point with additional examples or explanations to increase depth.
task achievement
Your task response is quite good but could be enhanced with a bit more detailed analysis. Focus on making your points even more specific and supported with more evidence.
coherence cohesion
Your logical structure is excellent, making it easy for the reader to follow your argument from introduction to conclusion.
task achievement
You provide a clear response to the task, addressing both how technology has changed relationships and whether this is positive or negative.
task achievement
The examples you provided are very relevant and help to illustrate your points effectively.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Interact
  • Social media platforms
  • Networking
  • Instant messaging
  • Face-to-face interaction
  • Misunderstandings
  • Emotional context
  • Superficial connections
  • Deceptive identities
  • Privacy concerns
  • Social skills
  • Video calls
  • Online presence
  • Digital communication
  • Cyber relationships
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