TASK 2: Many people aim to achieve a balance between work and other parts of lives, but few people achieve it. What are the causes of the problem? How to overcome it?

#people #aim #balance #work #parts #lives

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The issue of balancing between our job and our lifestyle has become a subject of discussion in recent years. Some people manage to balance their lives

while

others can't.

This

essay will discuss the causes of

this

situation and provide some solutions. First and foremost. To have a good

life

we need to fulfill our needs.

Such

as having family and friends to be with.

Also

, taking care of our bodies. Doing regular exercises and eating healthy meals

are

Change the verb form

show examples

crucial to have a great

life

Moreover

, of course, we need achievements in our careers. So we can have money to establish all these things I mentioned above we need to

work

Therefore

. Having a job is important as the other parts of our

life

However

, it

does

Verb problem

show examples

not

suppose

Wrong verb form

supposed

show examples

to ruin our social and healthy

life

. To address the problem of not balancing our

life

Firstly

time

management is the key. 90% of people fail to

fulfilled

Change the verb

fulfil

show examples

their other parts of

life

because they do not know how to manage their

time

. They just waste their

time

on phones and video games after

work

. Rather than spending

time

with their family or going to the gym.

Secondly

, having a task schedule could actually help. You can track yourself by the schedule.

As a result

of that, you will be more aware of what you do in the day.

Finally

, taking days off from

work

to relax and enjoy some

time

with your loved

one

Correct pronoun usage

ones

show examples

is a good idea. In conclusion, having a balanced

life

with

work

and other

life

parts depends on

time

management. Everyone should be aware of that.

Submitted by reem.rz112 on Thu Sep 26 2024

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coherence cohesion

To improve coherence, ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. Using linking words and phrases can help connect ideas and make the essay flow better.

task achievement

You should provide more specific examples and details to fully support your points. This will strengthen your task response and make your argument more compelling.

coherence cohesion

The essay provides a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. This makes the essay easy to follow.

task achievement

The main points are generally clear and relevant to the topic, addressing both causes and solutions to the problem of balancing work and life.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

270 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

work-life balance
burnout
flexible work arrangements
remote work
unplug
boundaries
workplace culture
societal pressure
stress management
time management

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TASK 2: Many people aim to achieve a balance between work and other parts of lives, but few people achieve it. What are the causes of the problem? How to overcome it?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Nowadays, many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organization. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self employed?

People living in the 21st century have a better life quality than people who lived in previous times. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

You have a problem with a recently hired employee in your workplace. Write a letter to the HR manager. In your letter: Describe the problem the new employee has caused Explain how other employees about the new employee’s conduct Say how you expect the HR manager to address the situation.