The bar chart below shows the percentage participation of men in senior development in three companies between 1980 and the year 2010 . Summaries the information by selecting and reporting in the main features, make comparisons where relevant .

The bar chart below shows the percentage participation of men in senior development in three companies between 1980 and the year 2010 . Summaries the information by selecting and reporting in the main features, make comparisons where relevant .
IELTS Writing Task Chart for The bar chart below shows the percentage participation of men in senior development in three companies between 1980 and the year 2010 . Summaries the information by selecting and reporting in the main features, make comparisons where relevant .
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The given chart illustrates the information about senior developers who participate
three
Change preposition
in three
show examples
companies, including
IBM
Use synonyms
,
Microsoft
Use synonyms
,
Use synonyms
Apple
Correct word choice
and Apple
show examples
, from 1980 to 2010
Overall
Linking Words
,
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
noticeable change can be observed, with
IBM
Use synonyms
showing
significant
Add an article
a significant
show examples
increase over the given period,
while
Linking Words
Apple
Use synonyms
remained steady.
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
Also,
show examples
Microsoft
Use synonyms
can be seen that the trend was stable, except for the
last
Linking Words
year. In detail,
IBM
Use synonyms
experienced a sharp rise from around 3% to over 60% between 1980 and 2010.
Additionally
Linking Words
, in half of the given period (1995, 2000 and 2010),
IBM
Use synonyms
had
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
higher percentages than
Microsoft
Use synonyms
and
Apple
Use synonyms
, especially in 2010, with 62%,45% and 35% respectively.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
Microsoft
Use synonyms
and
Apple
Use synonyms
fluctuated
steady
Change the adjective
steadily
show examples
. In
Apple
Use synonyms
, compared 1985 with 1995, which was the lowest and the highest percentage, there was just
approximely
Correct your spelling
approximately
6% change. Meanwhile.
Although
Linking Words
Micorosoft
Correct your spelling
Microsoft
had
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
smiliar
Correct your spelling
similar
trend
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
Apple
Use synonyms
,
Microsoft
Use synonyms
had once
rapidly
Change the word
rapid
show examples
increase
Change the verb form
increased
show examples
between 2000 and 2010,
which
Correct word choice
when
show examples
the percentage climbed by 30%.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words ibm, microsoft, apple with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • percentage participation
  • senior development roles
  • observed trends
  • notable increases/decreases
  • significant changes
  • consistency over time
  • influencing factors
  • industry shifts
  • socio-economic factors
  • comparison of data
  • similarities and differences
  • overall trends
  • implications
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