Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
It is argued that the
loss
of biodiversity is the main environmental issue of our time while
others think that there are other environmental problems that are more important. Although
the loss
of flora and fauna harms the ecosystem
, I agree with the latter idea due to
the fact that the main environmental problem
of our time is climate
change
rather than the loss
of flora and fauna.
Due to
the effects it can cause on our ecosystem
, the loss
of non-human species
is believed as our main environmental problem
. An ecosystem
is basically a system where each species
is connected and each plays a role to support its own habitat. In an ecosystem
, the existence of a species
can affect the existence of another species
. For example
, the disappearance of snakes in a paddy field ecosystem
will lead to an increase in mice which can destroy the crops. Therefore
, it can be argued that each species
is dependent on other species
in an ecosystem
, including us humans.
Nonetheless
, I believe that climate
change
is today's main environmental problem
which includes the disappearance of biodiversity. Climate
change
is caused by the increase of the earth's temperature which can cause many things, such
as extreme weather events, droughts, and sea level rise. Besides
its detrimental effects on our lives, it can also
affect plants and animals. For instance
, the sea level rise which is caused by climate
change
already drowns many surface areas in the Small Island Developing States. While
this
greatly affects humans, the homes of the animals, such
as birds and turtles are also
lost because of the sea level rise.
To conclude
, while
the fact that the disappearance of biodiversity hurts the ecosystem
prompts many people to believe that it is the main environmental issue today, I disagree with the idea. Instead
, I believe that other environmental problem
, mainly climate
change
is the main environmental problem
today because climate
change
affects all living species
greatly.Submitted by aribawadzaki on
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task achievement
Your essay does a good job addressing both viewpoints and providing a clear opinion. However, make the connection between the loss of biodiversity and climate change more explicit. This can strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that succinctly introduces the main idea. This can further enhance the logical flow of your essay.
task achievement
You have provided relevant examples and explanations, but adding a few more specific case studies or scientific data can reinforce your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Try to use a wider range of cohesive devices and transition words to further improve the smoothness and flow of your essay.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear and concise introduction and conclusion, which effectively frame your essay.
task achievement
Both points of view are discussed in balanced detail, showing a comprehensive understanding of the issue.
task achievement
The essay includes relevant and specific examples, which helps in illustrating your points effectively.