Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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It is argued that the
loss
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of biodiversity is the main environmental issue of our time
while
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others think that there are other environmental problems that are more important.
Although
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the
loss
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of flora and fauna harms the
ecosystem
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, I agree with the latter idea
due to
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the fact that the main environmental
problem
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of our time is
climate
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change
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rather than the
loss
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of flora and fauna.
Due to
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the effects it can cause on our
ecosystem
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, the
loss
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of non-human
species
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is believed as our main environmental
problem
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. An
ecosystem
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is basically a system where each
species
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is connected and each plays a role to support its own habitat. In an
ecosystem
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, the existence of a
species
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can affect the existence of another
species
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.
For example
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, the disappearance of snakes in a paddy field
ecosystem
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will lead to an increase in mice which can destroy the crops.
Therefore
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, it can be argued that each
species
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is dependent on other
species
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in an
ecosystem
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, including us humans.
Nonetheless
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, I believe that
climate
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change
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is today's main environmental
problem
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which includes the disappearance of biodiversity.
Climate
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change
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is caused by the increase of the earth's temperature which can cause many things,
such
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as extreme weather events, droughts, and sea level rise.
Besides
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its detrimental effects on our lives, it can
also
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affect plants and animals.
For instance
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, the sea level rise which is caused by
climate
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change
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already drowns many surface areas in the Small Island Developing States.
While
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this
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greatly affects humans, the homes of the animals,
such
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as birds and turtles are
also
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lost because of the sea level rise.
To conclude
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,
while
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the fact that the disappearance of biodiversity hurts the
ecosystem
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prompts many people to believe that it is the main environmental issue today, I disagree with the idea.
Instead
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, I believe that other environmental
problem
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, mainly
climate
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change
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is the main environmental
problem
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today because
climate
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change
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affects all living
species
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greatly.
Submitted by aribawadzaki on

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task achievement
Your essay does a good job addressing both viewpoints and providing a clear opinion. However, make the connection between the loss of biodiversity and climate change more explicit. This can strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that succinctly introduces the main idea. This can further enhance the logical flow of your essay.
task achievement
You have provided relevant examples and explanations, but adding a few more specific case studies or scientific data can reinforce your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Try to use a wider range of cohesive devices and transition words to further improve the smoothness and flow of your essay.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear and concise introduction and conclusion, which effectively frame your essay.
task achievement
Both points of view are discussed in balanced detail, showing a comprehensive understanding of the issue.
task achievement
The essay includes relevant and specific examples, which helps in illustrating your points effectively.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • biodiversity
  • extinction
  • habitat loss
  • ecosystem
  • food chain
  • imbalance
  • interconnected
  • climate change
  • pollution
  • personal actions
  • policy changes
  • education
  • awareness
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