Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
It is believed by some that
music
can unite people
across cultures and ages. From my perspective, there are some circumstances that violate this
statement, but overall
music
can act as a strong unifier.
To begin
with, there are many reasons why music
can bring people
with
different ages and cultures together. Change preposition
of
Firstly
, throughout the
history Correct article usage
apply
music
has been an important criterion to unite
Change preposition
for uniting
people
. For example
, when a nation is at war they try to boost their soldiers' spirit by singing an epic song
. These soldiers may come from different parts of the country with various ages and cultures yet they get inspired by their national song
.
Furthermore
, another aspect to consider is that individuals can express their inner feelings through the
Correct article usage
apply
music
. All human-beings
around the Correct your spelling
human beings
world
have similar emotions, such
as sadness, joy, anxiety, and
etc. These feelings are a universal language that may unite Correct word choice
apply
people
no matter what their mother language is. When they share similar responses to a song
or a genre, it can create a sense of connection and understanding. For example
, Michael Jackson’s Heal The World
is one example of a song
that was intentionally made to unite people
across the world
. It is written clearly in the lyrics, to bring people
’s spirit up to create a greater world
to live in.
However
, people
may have different tastes of music
. In other words
, a single genre of music
may not be preferable by
everyone. Change preposition
to
For instance
, listening to rap or hip-hop music
is a trend between
youth, but elders may prefer classical or countryside Change preposition
among
music
. In these cases, not only music
cannot act as an
unifier, but Change the article
a
also
may cause
arguments between older Wrong verb form
causes
people
and younger ones.
In conclusion, regardless to
different peoples’ Change preposition
of
music
Replace the word
musical
taste
, Fix the agreement mistake
tastes
music
plays an essential role in uniting people
from different backgrounds.It creates a universal language that closes the cultural or even the age gap by building a sense of emotional connection and understanding.Submitted by mehdi1998d on
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coherence cohesion
To further enhance cohesion, use more connective words or phrases such as "in addition," "on the other hand," or "moreover" to link ideas and paragraphs more fluidly.
task achievement
Vary sentence structures and lengths to maintain reader engagement and clarity.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear structure, with a strong introduction and conclusion that effectively frames the argument.
task achievement
The essay includes relevant examples, such as Michael Jackson’s "Heal The World," to support the main points, which adds depth to the argument.