IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. It is observed that in many countries not enough students are choosing to study science as a subject. What are the causes? And what will be the effects on society? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.

#minutes #countries #students #study #science #effects #society
In most nations , very few
students
 are paying attention to learning
science
. I believe
this
 is
due to
 the high complexity
while
 reading. There are numerous effects of not studying
science
 as
this
 modern world and
society
 are fully dependent on scientific technologies.
To begin
 with,
science
 is regarded as one of the most complex subjects for learners as it involves a vast level of chapters which
students
 will find difficult to learn.
Similarly
, to gain knowledge an active mind and attention should be prioritised by the children.
Additionally
, the scientific study mainly involves a plethora of practical methods which play a vital role in minimizing youngsters' interest in concern.
For instance
,
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
recent research done by NASA has revealed that the decline of
science
 readers is
due to
 the lack of seriousness among
students
.
Due to
this
,
society
 will have to face some serious consequences in the future.
This
 is because
this
 advanced world is full of scientific innovation and
science
 is required everywhere to present research and utilize
such
 inventions.
In addition
, if children do not have knowledge about
science
then
 they have to face tough situations in
society
.
Similarly
,
this
 will hinder
society
 as the
students
 cannot make new discoveries and meet the demands of
society
.
For example
, in India,
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
show examples
 of
students
 are restricted from using scientific technologies
due to
 not having enough knowledge about
science
. To encapsulate,
due to
 the hard level of study majority of
students
 avoid
to drag
Change the verb form
dragging
show examples
 their attention towards
science
. Because of
this
,
society
 has to face serious issues regarding new discoveries and innovations.
Submitted by cranjal07 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Provide more specific and varied examples to strengthen your points. Include examples from different countries or contexts if possible.
coherence and cohesion
Work on creating smoother transitions between your ideas for a more coherent flow.
introduction
The introduction clearly states the problem and outlines the structure of the essay.
logical structure
Each paragraph addresses a specific aspect of the problem, which helps in organizing the essay effectively.
conclusion
The conclusion effectively encapsulates the main points of the essay, reinforcing the message presented.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: