In some countries university students live at home with their family while they study, whereas in other countries students attend university in another city. Do you think the benefits of living away from home during university outweigh the disadvantages?

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In today's society, college
students
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prefer to stay with their families,
while
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other
students
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choose to go to the other
city
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for education.
However
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living with the family during education can guarantee that we have supporters on our side, and
students
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become more responsible
while
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living alone in the other
city
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to pursue their dreams. I believe, the advantages of living far away from families, outweigh the disadvantages. On one hand, the primary benefit of living away from home is the significant opportunity to develop our personal abilities. When new
students
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move to the new
city
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, they encounter a challenge about how to adapt and survive by themselves.
Students
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have to learn basic life skills
such
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as cooking, cleaning the room, and groceries. Other than that,
students
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have to understand budgeting, and really crucial to control their living expenses.
For instance
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,
students
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record all their expenses every month, so they can evaluate their cash flow every month and
as a result
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, they can have their money management and maybe they
also
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have savings.
On the other hand
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, letting
students
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stay alone in the new cities, brings potential disadvantages because feeling isolation and loneliness.
Students
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have to pretend to be as strong as they can with themself. Moving to new cities often brings unexpected hardship, which leads to emotional uncontrol. In their hometown,
students
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usually have their parents and siblings as a place to share their thoughts and problems,
while
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in a new
city
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, they need to put a boundary with their friends at the beginning of moving.
For example
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, A new student with high aspirations may feel overwhelmed by loneliness in a strange
city
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, leading to decreased motivation. In conclusion, living away from home during university offers opportunities for self-improvement,
such
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as gaining independence and life skills.
However
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, it can
also
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lead to feelings of isolation and loneliness. Balancing these aspects is essential for academics as they navigate
this
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important period in their lives.
Submitted by yannn on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph maintains a clear focus and logically connects to the next. Try to make transitions smoother.
task achievement
Although the essay clearly addresses both sides of the argument, further elaboration on the disadvantages could provide more balance.
coherence cohesion
The essay effectively provides an introduction and conclusion, summarizing the main points.
coherence cohesion
Main points are well-supported with examples, which helps in illustrating the arguments clearly.
task achievement
The task is fully addressed, with a clear stance on the advantages and disadvantages.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • independence
  • self-reliance
  • finance management
  • exposure
  • broaden horizons
  • open-minded
  • adaptability
  • conducive environment
  • isolation
  • homesickness
  • financial burden
  • household duties
  • academic responsibilities
  • personal growth
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