In today’s competitive world, many families find it necessary for both parents to go out to work. While some say the children in these families benefit from the additional income, others feel they lack support because of their parents’ absence.What are your opinions?

#today’s #world #families #parents #work #say #children #benefit #income #lack #support #parents’ #absence

In contemporary society, with the rise in the cost of living and increased competition, both

parents

must work to earn more money. The question of whether

this

brings more advantages for

children

has become a matter of considerable debate.

Although

some argue that

this

situation causes

parents

to not have enough

time

to spend with their

children

, I believe

this

choice is more beneficial for them.

Firstly

, dual-income families can provide a higher standard of living for their

children

. With more financial resources,

parents

can afford better education, extracurricular activities, and healthcare.

For example

children

can attend private schools, participate in various enrichment programs, and receive top-notch medical care, all of which contribute to their

overall

development and future success.

Secondly

, the additional income can reduce financial stress within the family

Replace the punctuation

...

show examples

This

can lead to a more balanced and harmonious family environment, as financial stability often

associates

Wrong verb form

associated

show examples

with reduced conflict and stress.

Consequently

parents

can focus more on spending quality

time

with their

children

when they are not burdened by financial concerns.

However

, it is essential to acknowledge the concerns regarding parental absence.

While

it is true that

children

may feel neglected when both

parents

are working,

this

issue can be mitigated with proper

time

management and prioritization.

Parents

can ensure they spend meaningful

time

with their

children

by planning family activities and being present during important moments. In conclusion,

although

there are concerns about the lack of parental support in dual-income families, I believe the benefits of the additional income outweigh these drawbacks. The improved standard of living and financial stability provided by both

parents

working

Verb problem

apply

show examples

ultimately contribute positively to the family's well-being.

Submitted by zora840810 on Thu Jul 18 2024

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

273 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

7.5

Logical structure

7.5

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

dual-income households
financial stability
work-life balance
emotional well-being
parental involvement
social development
extracurricular activities
childcare solutions
time management
career advancement

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In today’s competitive world, many families find it necessary for both parents to go out to work. While some say the children in these families benefit from the additional income, others feel they lack support because of their parents’ absence.What are your opinions?

Fully explain your ideas

Many people around the world use social media everyday to keep in touch with other people and get new events. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Big salary is much more important than job satisfaction. Do you agree or disagree? Provide relevant examples if necessary.

number of arrests per year for using illegal drugs between 1991 to 2005

Eco-tourism often involves visiting remote and fragile ecosystems, which raises concerns about the impact on local cultures and indigenous communities. What problems can this cause? How can these problems be resolved?