Longer life spans and improvements in the health of older people suggest that people over the age of sixty-five can continue to live full and active lives. In what ways can society benefit from the contribution that older people can make?

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In
this
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day and age, technological advancements have led to an increase in life expectancy and the strengthening of health in older
people
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,
thus
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enabling them to live an exuberant life. The following essay is going to discuss the positive effects it brings to society. First and foremost,
people
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who are over sixty-five can continue to contribute to society in the form of working. Simply put, though older individuals may not be fit to participate in works that require physical strength, there are plenty of jobs that could be a good fit for the elderly
such
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as guards and running a small vendor.
For example
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, in Vietnam, old
people
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tend to work as guards for clothing shops, in which their main task is helping customers park their vehicles on the sidewalk.
Moreover
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, many senior citizens in Vietnam still open their own businesses, normally serving light meals or running a convenience store.
Furthermore
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, senior citizens can work in charity.
This
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is
due to
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the fact that many elderly have retired, so they have a lot of free time and energy, so many of them would direct their efforts into helping
people
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in need.
For instance
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, a group of old Vietnamese ladies once set up a counter in front of a hospital in Hanoi to give away free food to relatives of the patients, who were, at the time, tight on money because they needed to save up for medical procedures. In conclusion, the long life spans and improvements in the health of senior citizens mean that they can still contribute to our society despite their old age,
such
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as continue working and doing charity.
Submitted by duongntt.tld on

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coherence
Try to improve the fluency and logical flow between your paragraphs with clearer topic sentences that transition smoothly from one idea to the next.
cohesion
Clarify certain points with additional details to enhance understanding, as some ideas may seem generalized or lacking depth.
coherence
The essay achieves a balanced introduction and conclusion, tying the main ideas together effectively.
task response
You provide relevant and specific examples, particularly those relatable to the situation in Vietnam, enhancing the essay's relevance and engagement.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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