WRITING TASK 2 You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: In many countries, childhood obesity is a growing problem. What are the reasons for this and what can individuals and governments do to tackle the problem? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.
In recent years, experts have been concerned about the spread of obesity among children.
This
essay will present the causes of this
problem and possible solutions to decrease this
trend.
To begin
with, obesity could be caused by both a lack of physical exercise and unhealthy eating habits. Furthermore
, fewer kids are spending time playing outside or practising sports. That is
because of the popularity of video games and other activities that require sitting all day long. For example
, if a child is gifted an XBox or lessons in his favourite sport, it is not hard to predict that he will choose the first option. In addition
, after the pandemic, more and more parents are becoming overprotective, being scared of letting their sons and daughters practise outside to avoid hurting themselves or becoming ill. On the other hand
, also
schools play an important role in this
situation, the reason behind it
is that they usually serve unhealthy food to save money. Correct pronoun usage
this
For instance
, eating in the canteen in the USA is very expensive and nutritionists, after studying their meal plan, claim that it is far from a balanced diet.
To address this
issue, many things could be done to improve healthy habits during childhood. Firstly
, more physical activities should be included during the school day, but also
in the afternoon. Creating new sports clubs where little friends play all together keeping themselves fit could be a perfect example of that. Moreover
, the government should introduce laws to establish the quality of food served to students, with the help of doctors and paediatricians to create a balanced diet for the young generation. For instance
, instead
of cooking french fries, they could be replaced by broccoli or other vegetables.
In conclusion, childhood obesity is a dangerous issue due to
the laziness and eating routine of children, but it could be faced with improvements by schools and institutions to help families prevent it.Submitted by matilderestelli.work on
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task achievement
Consider expanding on the consequences of childhood obesity to highlight the importance of addressing this problem.
task achievement
Ensure that each paragraph fully supports the main topic with detailed explanations and examples.
coherence cohesion
Work on improving the transitions between ideas in your paragraphs to enhance the flow of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Vary your linking phrases to make the structure more interesting and less repetitive.
task achievement
You provide a clear and comprehensive introduction to the topic, setting the context effectively.
task achievement
You offer practical solutions to the problem discussed, which adds depth to your response.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion succinctly summarizes the main points and reinforces your position.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a logical structure with a clear progression of ideas.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?