Some people think that only the government can make significant changes in society, while others think that individual can have a lot of influence. What is your opinion?

#people #government #changes #society #influence

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It is a common belief that the Government lead to huge

changes

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our

society

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as they are able to

chang

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change

show examples

the frames of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society

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such

Linking Words

as laws, general rules and regulations.

However

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, I firmly believe that

Individuals

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lead to more

enomous

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enormous

changes

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society

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Individuals

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are influenced by other

individuals

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To begin

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with,

people

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are impacted by other

individuals

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Moreover

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people

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hanker after

others

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's lives which they have not done yet and tend to imitate

others

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For example

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, Modern

society

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allow

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allows

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us to watch various lives from other

individuals

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via social network

service

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services

show examples

such

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as YouTube and Instagram.

People

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are likely to be inspired by them, especially about their positive features including volunteering and social activities.

This

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not only

bring

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brings

show examples

attention from

individuals

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about

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social

issue

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issues

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but

also

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put

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puts

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their support to these situations.

Furthermore

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This

Linking Words

attentions

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attention

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must give solutions to the

problem

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problems

show examples

society

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and

occur

Verb problem

create

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a better

society

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. On top of

this

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, It can be seen that

people

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care more

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about

show examples

their appearances,

such

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as behaviours, attitudes and outfits, when they believe that they are being recognized by

others

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Additionally

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, Reputation is an important value in modern

society

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This

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tendency helps

the

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apply

show examples

society

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to establish the social standard,

such

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as norms and justice. These fundamental minds make valuable

changes

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society

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. In conclusion, even though Which

gorvenment

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government

governments

individuals

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brings

Correct subject-verb agreement

bring

show examples

noticable

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noticeable

changes

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society

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can be

cotroversial

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controversial

. It is true that government have

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the

show examples

power to control

the

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apply

show examples

society

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Linking Words

however

Add a comma

however,

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I personally think that

individuals

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contribute more significant shifts in

society

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due to

Linking Words

individuals

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are

Wrong verb form

being

show examples

interected

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intersected

interested

with

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show examples

others

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Additionally

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, they are inspired by

others

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more.

Submitted by yhj000801 on Fri Oct 11 2024

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supporting evidence

Ensure all main points are well-supported with clear and logical examples.

examples usage

Work on providing clearer examples related to individuals making significant societal changes.

language use

Revise grammatical inaccuracies, especially verb forms and article usage, to enhance clarity.

structure

The essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, which effectively set up and wrap up the discussion.

task response

The argument that individuals influence societal change is a strong and relevant perspective.

relevance examples

The use of examples from modern contexts like social media is a good attempt to make the points relatable.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
25
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

271 words

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Some people think that only the government can make significant changes in society, while others think that individual can have a lot of influence. What is your opinion?

The internet has greatly increased our access to information. To what extent do you think this is a good thing? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experienc

Smoking not only harms the smoker, but also those who are nearby. Therefore, smoking should be banned in public places. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Differing amount of nitrogen oxide by four types of vehicles.

In a public-funded healthcare system, people who are willing to pay for the best and fast treatment should be able to do so. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Museums and art gallaries should concentrate on works that show histroy and culture of their own country rather than works of the other parts in the world. To what extent to do you agree or disagree?