Some people believe that stricter punishments can reduce crime rates. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Laws and
society
rules are essential in any civilized nation. Some researchers think that harder sanctions can limit Replace the word
societal
crime
levels. In my opinion, i
agree with that proposal of Change the capitalization
I
strengthien
punishments; Correct your spelling
strengthen
however
, in this
essay the
both aspects will be discussed.
Remove the article
apply
First,
It is true that strict laws can adjust human behaviour
in the community. The believers in that direction claim analyize
the reward of the Correct your spelling
analyse
crime
against the punishment to calcualte
the risk. Correct your spelling
calculate
Thus
, increasing the cost of crime
Replace the word
criminal
behaviour
will limit the
criminal actions. Correct article usage
apply
For instance
, increasing Correct article usage
the prision
prision
period for criminal Correct your spelling
prison
activites
may Correct your spelling
activities
activity
made
the criminal change his mind.
Change the verb form
make
be made
On the other hand
, the other approach has an alterntive soultion
for Correct your spelling
alternative solution
this
matter which is rehabilitation the criminals. The supporters of this
aspect believe that education and training programs could change the
human Correct article usage
apply
behaviour
in an effective way compared to punishments. For example
, many developed countries like USA and Europian
countries are investing in Correct your spelling
European
prisions
and Correct your spelling
prisons
prepare
programs to educate Wrong verb form
preparing
the
criminals and improve Correct article usage
apply
thier
skills in order to shift Correct your spelling
their
his
mentality from Correct pronoun usage
their
crime
Replace the word
criminal
activites
and teach Correct your spelling
activities
him
how to make money through Correct pronoun usage
them
leagl
ways. Correct your spelling
legal
illegal
Furthermore
, the human rights organization monitor the crimanals
rights in prisons to make sure he is Correct your spelling
criminals
criminal
in
the recovery path.
Change preposition
on
To conclude
, strict rules and laws are an immediate soultion
to limit Correct your spelling
solution
crime
activites
. Meanwhile, rehabilitation is a Correct your spelling
activities
long term
way to reduce illegal Add a hyphen
long-term
behaviour
in the community. The governments can work in parallel to increase nation’s
safety.Correct article usage
the nation’s
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task response
Make sure to address all parts of the task by offering balanced views and a clear stance. For instance, ensure your opinion is more evident throughout the essay, and consider elaborating further on the impacts of stricter punishments and rehabilitation.
coherence cohesion
Use linking words and cohesive devices consistently throughout your essay to improve the flow of ideas. Ensuring that each paragraph flows logically from one to the next will enhance coherence.
task response
Make sure all points are fully supported. Providing more specific examples that relate directly to the points will strengthen your argumentation.
introduction conclusion
The essay provides a well-written introduction and conclusion, clearly structuring the response.
supported main points
The essay attempts to discuss both perspectives with a fair level of detail and an effort to balance.
Word Count
IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.
A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.
Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.