In the last century when a human astronaut arrived on the moon, He said “it is a big step for mankind”. But some people say it makes little or no difference to our daily life. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Last
century, the first man on earth landed on the moon
, yet some people say it has little impact on the daily life of mankind. In this
essay, I will discuss why I partially agree that despite the achievement of space
exploration it has no difference in ordinary citizens' lives.
On one hand, the benefit of having someone explore the moon
is for
scientific knowledge. Change preposition
apply
Thus
, it brought answers to questions relating to outer space
such
as the feasibility of life, and confirming and debunking theories. Although
the answers are interesting , the government spends enormously in order to fund the "moon
landing". It can be helpful to scientists and other space
enthusiasts yet for practicality in life, there are no life-saving changes at all.
Furthermore
, the budget intended for space
explorations can be diverted for pressing issues such
as healthcare and housing. Additionally
, health sectors need more help from the government to provide funding for equipment, medication subsidies and wellness activities. Thus
, if these things were given priority then
, there would be greater good experienced by a lot of citizens. To discuss further
, facts about the type of soil on the moon
cannot feed the hungry people who need food instead
of facts. For instance
, according to
Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, the basic factors must be achieved such
as clothing, food, and health before the person can advance to the top category.
In conclusion, although
scientific discoveries on multidimensional exploration are helpful, it does not address immediate problems such
as hunger and disease. Personally, I believe that current obstacles that affect the
greater number of people need more attention.Correct article usage
a
Submitted by emmagallares on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task response
To improve task response, try to address both views (agree and disagree) more comprehensively. You only discussed the side that highlights the limitations of the moon landing, without thoroughly exploring what benefits it might have on everyday life.
task response
Work on providing more detailed examples or evidence to support your points. This will strengthen your argument and make your essay more convincing.
coherence cohesion
Enhance cohesion by using a wider range of linking words to connect your ideas more fluidly. This will help the essay to flow better from one point to another.
coherence cohesion
The essay is clearly structured with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
coherence cohesion
The main argument is consistently developed throughout the essay, providing a clear line of reasoning.
task response
The essay addresses specific disadvantages of purely focusing on space exploration, providing a balanced view to some extent.