IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Fossil fuels (coal, oil, natural gas) are the main source in many countries, but in some countries the use of alternative source of energy (wind and solar energy) are encouraged. To what extent do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Fossil fuels
such
Linking Words
 as coal, oil and natural gas still dominate the global
energy
Use synonyms
 supply, yet many governments are actively promoting renewable sources like
wind
Use synonyms
 and solar power. In my view, the shift toward alternative
energy
Use synonyms
 is overwhelmingly positive because it mitigates environmental damage, strengthens
energy
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 security, and stimulates technological innovation. First and foremost, renewable
energy
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 plays a decisive role in tackling climate change. Burning coal and oil emits vast amounts of carbon dioxide, a primary driver of global warming.
By contrast
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,
wind
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 turbines and solar panels generate electricity without releasing greenhouse gases. Countries that invest heavily in renewables,
such
Linking Words
 as Denmark and Germany, have already reduced their carbon footprints significantly.
Therefore
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, encouraging the use of clean
energy
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 is a crucial strategy for safeguarding ecosystems and human health. Another advantage lies in enhancing national
energy
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 security. Fossil fuel markets are prone to geopolitical tensions and price fluctuations, leaving importing nations vulnerable to sudden shortages. By diversifying their
energy
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 mix with domestic renewables, countries can achieve greater independence and price stability.
For instance
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, Iceland and Norway meet almost all their electricity demand through renewable sources, shielding their economies from oil price shocks.
Furthermore
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, the renewable sector drives technological progress and job creation. Investment in solar cell research, battery storage and smart grids has led to rapid cost reductions and new high-skill employment opportunities.
This
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 transition can
revitalize
Use the right word
revitalise
show examples
 rural areas where
wind
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 and solar farms are often located, fostering balanced economic growth. Admittedly, renewable
energy
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 currently faces challenges
such
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 as intermittent supply and high initial installation costs.
However
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, these obstacles are steadily diminishing as storage technology improves and economies of scale lower prices.
Consequently
Linking Words
, the long-term benefits far outweigh the temporary drawbacks. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
 fossil fuels still underpin many economies, actively promoting
wind
Use synonyms
 and solar power is an overwhelmingly positive development. It curbs environmental degradation, bolsters
energy
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 independence, and accelerates technological advancement. Governments worldwide should
therefore
Linking Words
 intensify their efforts to support the clean-
energy
Use synonyms
 transition.

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strength
Your view is clear and strong, which fits the task well.
language
Link ideas with simple words to show flow between parts.
content
Add one more example or fact to show more proof.
style
Shorter sentences will help the meaning stay clear.
task response
Clear view with good support.
coherence
Good order and link words.
examples
Useful real place examples.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Fossil fuels
  • Renewable energy
  • Greenhouse gas emissions
  • Carbon footprint
  • Climate change
  • Economic benefits
  • Energy security
  • Energy dependency
  • Infrastructure investment
  • Intermittent nature
  • Sustainable development
  • Technological innovation
  • Renewable energy sector
  • Pollution reduction
  • Job creation
  • Energy diversification
  • Global energy market
  • Geopolitical tensions
  • Supply chain disruptions
  • Energy storage systems
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