Some people say that the best way to improve the overall general health of the public is to offer more sports facilities. Others say that this would have little effect and other measure are necessary to improve public health. Discuss both views.
few
people
argue that taking part in sports
is more effective for health
while
others think that public health
can be improved by taking other initiatives.In this
essay, I will discuss both points of view related to public health
.
on the one hand, sports
activities are important for improving the health
of both men and women because they help to boost the immune system of the body as well as
, protect us from many diseases like cardiovascular disease, hypertension and stress level of a person. Furthermore
, doing exercises lowers your cholesterol level so that your heart remains healthy and you have fewer chances of cardiovascular attack. secondly
, working out and going to the gym keep people
refreshed and keep them away from many negative thoughts that make your daily life difficult.Additionally
, people
are less indulged in mental illness while
going to the gym. For example
, in one study it has been shown that in Pakistan 85 % of people
have heart problems because of not doing regular exercise.Therefore
it is very important to do daily exercises.
on the other hand
, besides
sports
there are many other methods to keep people
healthy like daily home activities, like moving, going up the stairs and while
some people
think that doing routine work is just like doing a gym at home as a result
, their overall
physical health
is effected by doing just little routine work.As compared to sports
, a proper diet have also
beneficial effects on health
eating apples keeps you away from the doctor and consuming proper amounts of nutrients keeps you mentally as well as
physically healthy.For instance
, people
who eat unhealthy food are at increased risk of obesity, and non-communicable diseases.hence
besides
sports
other factors also
contribute to health
.
To sum up
, sports
are very important to keep us safe and sound but some other factors are also
important like healthy diets.Submitted by madihaali8470 on
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task achievement
Try to refine your introduction by clearly stating the central argument and framing it more precisely. This helps in setting up a clear direction for your essay.
task achievement
Include clearer and more specific examples to back up your arguments better. This could add strength to your essay and make your opinions more convincing.
coherence cohesion
Strive for better logical transitions between points. While the general flow is understandable, evident signals when changing ideas would enhance coherence.
coherence cohesion
The essay presents an appropriately structured introduction and conclusion, quickly setting the context and wrapping up the discussion.
task achievement
You effectively present both sides of the argument regarding how to improve public health, touching upon various perspectives.
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