Over recent years, mobile phones have become an indispensable tool in our daily lives. However, there are several problems such as social and medical which must not be ignored. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of mobile phones

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It's true that, over recent years, mobile
phones
have become an indispensable tool in our lives.
However
, there are several problems
such
as social and medical which must not be ignored. I would argue that these problems are heavier than advantages. Nowadays, mobile
phones
make accessing information easier, with mobile
phones
, you can stay connected to
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
and access much information.
For instance
,
teacher
Correct article usage
the teacher
show examples
give
Change the verb form
gives
show examples
you
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
homework about investigating
galaxy
Correct article usage
the galaxy
show examples
.
Instead
of searching
millions
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for millions
show examples
of books at
library
Add an article
the library
show examples
, you can easily ask
Change preposition
for it
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
from
Change preposition
on
show examples
Add an article
the internet
show examples
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
. Mobile
phones
make communication easy.
For example
, you want to be friends with a foreigner. You can download an app and can find many foreign friends.
However
, there are downsides to mobile
phones
. Students often get distracted from their studies
due to
allure
Correct article usage
the allure
show examples
of
phones
, affecting
tehir
Correct your spelling
their
focus on education.
For example
, when
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
have exams, I keep my phone away from me. With that
way
Add a comma
way,
show examples
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
can focus on my exams.
Additionally
,
like
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apply
show examples
watching movies,
playing
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and playing
show examples
games can lead to eye discomfort
such
as dryness,
redness
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and redness
show examples
.
For instance
, Most of the new generation
children
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of children
show examples
and young people have glasses. Because they spent more unnecessary time on mobile
phones
. In summary,
while
mobile
phones
have entertainment,
quick
Correct word choice
and quick
show examples
access to information, they can
also
be distracting for people who are studying,
working
Correct word choice
or working
show examples
. It's very necessary to use mobile
phones
responsibly and protect
balance
Add an article
the balance
show examples
between advantages
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their drawbacks.
Submitted by aytacmustafali15 on

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task response
To improve your task response, try addressing both the advantages and disadvantages more equally. Your essay leans more towards the disadvantages, so make sure you provide a balanced view of both sides.
coherence cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, consider using linking words and phrases more effectively to improve the flow of your ideas. This will help in making the essay more engaging and easier to follow.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction clearly outlines the issue and your position, which creates a good foundation for the essay.
task response
The examples used, such as homework investigation and personal exam strategies, add a practical dimension to your arguments.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Indispensable tool
  • Excessive use
  • Social media
  • Smartphones
  • Access to information
  • Emergency calls
  • GPS navigation
  • Addiction
  • Eye strain
  • Potential radiation exposure
  • Superficial interactions
  • Face-to-face communication
  • Personal safety
  • Prolonged use
  • Quality time
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