IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is believed that the main purpose of
science
Use synonyms
 should be to provide an easier life in society.
While
Linking Words
 I recognize the benefits of
science
Use synonyms
 in areas
such
Linking Words
 as healthcare, there are some aspects that do not align with my opinion. On the one hand,
science
Use synonyms
 may provide advanced methods for disorders which can't be cured with today's technologies.
For example
Linking Words
, lethal health issues
such
Linking Words
 as cancer can be cured with the help of specific laser methods that became popular with the development of the technologies in healthcare and these advancements will
also
Linking Words
 continue to improve during the next years.
Additionally
Linking Words
,
science
Use synonyms
 may help to develop tools that will have positive impacts on people's lives and ease their daily tasks. Artificial intelligence tools with the capability of handling tasks from programming to design can be a great example of these tools.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, it does not mean that all enhancements in
science
Use synonyms
 will positively impact the community. Different bombs, or weapons that have been improved with the latest enhancements of
science
Use synonyms
 play a significant role in some societies' peace,
as well as
Linking Words
 seem as a threat to others.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, different algorithms and platforms
such
Linking Words
 as websites which ask for user details are created many in count to get the personal information of the members which is sold to different companies to gain some money in the next stage. These kinds of actions are out of the legal framework and can damage someone's reputation or image. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
science
Use synonyms
 offers great opportunities and enhances people's lives by providing facilities in different sectors, some may abuse these improvements for their own good rather than society's.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Ensure a clearer stance in the introduction about whether you agree or disagree with the statement.
coherence cohesion
Make sure each paragraph focuses on a single idea for better clarity.
task achievement
Include more real-life examples to support your points.
task achievement
Your essay includes both sides of the argument, which shows your ability to see multiple perspectives.
coherence cohesion
Good use of transition words, such as 'on the one hand' and 'on the other hand,' to guide the reader through the argument.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which frames the argument well.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • crucial role
  • enhancing
  • quality of human life
  • advancements
  • medicine
  • healthcare
  • scientific research
  • solving societal problems
  • improving living standards
  • global issues
  • climate change
  • food scarcity
  • technological advancements
  • limitations
  • negative consequences
  • ethical considerations
  • sustainability
  • environmental preservation
What to do next:
Look at other essays: