some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it

Opinions differ regarding the effect of advertising on
people
’s intention to buy products.
While
some
people
claim that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things, I side with those who urge advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. On the one hand, some
people
claim that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things.
This
is because companies have already researched costumer’s
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
and the benefit of their products before producing an advertisement.
Although
this
production process usually takes a huge amount of money, companies believe
this
advertising will encourage a high volume of sales.
For instance
, an advertising company claims that it spends more than a hundred eggs for one-take action of an Indomie’s product.
However
, I believe the frequency of advertising triggers customers to be exhausted from watching it and tend to just skip it.
On the other hand
, I agree with those who say advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Since the advertising usually takes every ten minutes of television or YouTube content, many
people
often easily switch the channel or push the next button on their television remotes.
For example
, Global TV, a television channel owned by the Perindo party, often broadcasts the Mars song of the Perindo in order to campaign for its party. I think
people
just no longer want to hear it since they already know
this
song.
As a result
, advertising may not be effective anymore to persuade
people
to choose Perindo. In conclusion,
although
some
people
claim that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things, I side with those who argue that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it.
This
is because
people
just no longer want to hear since they already know it.
Submitted by adittyafatma on

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Coherence and Cohesion
While your essay structure is quite solid, try to improve your coherence by ensuring flawless transition between ideas. This can be done by using a wider range of linking phrases.
Task Response
Make sure your examples are more detailed and broad to substantiate your claims and provide a balanced argument by considering more perspectives.
Language Accuracy
Try to avoid some small grammatical errors by proofreading your essay for tense consistency and subject-verb agreement.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay has a clear structure with a distinct introduction and conclusion that summarize the main points effectively.
Task Response
You have done well to address different opinions regarding the topic, showing a balanced perspective.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • persuade
  • promote
  • attract
  • influence
  • impact
  • consumerism
  • commercialism
  • market
  • product
  • brand
  • endorsement
  • manipulative
  • saturated
  • overwhelmed
  • repetitive
  • distracting
  • irrelevant
  • exaggerated
  • misleading
  • desensitized
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